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Two orphaned brothers inherit a mysterious ranch, and in attempting to uncover their own biological origins, they are ushered into the world of a secret organization, whose altruistic values will soon be challenged when an alien entity threatens to corrupt their world.
SYNOPSIS:
A prequel introduction leads us in to our PILOT episode, with a montage of the culmination of what happened two years ago, when the most recent Adams’ family member, Hani, was researching the mysteries at Keystone Ranch. Hani went “mad”, and the OI had to commit him to their very own mental hospital.
The PILOT episode begins with the OI mysteriously delivering a package, the notice of inheritance of Keystone Ranch, to the Adams’ brothers. The brothers, Danny and Jake, are both intrigued and excited, yet trepidatious and skeptical. Having grown up in a most excellent foster home, not coincidentally run by the OI, the brothers we’re always well taken care of, treated like royalty even, but they always still longed to know who their “real” family was, which manifested in a pattern of rebellion as youths, and led them to search out for their biological family as adults. A search that they would eventually exhaust, yielding no results, and only causing friction between the two of them.
At the same time as Danny and Jake are delivered the package from the OI, the fictional town of Keystone prepares for their arrival, and if all goes as planned, their indoctrination. The town is run outwardly by Sheriff Bill and his deputies, but inwardly by the OI. Located inside the fictional county of Crojai (pronounced “Crow-Eye”), this is the way things have been run for generations, since Keystone’s inception.
The episode tracks the main character’s actions in the days leading up to the brothers’ arrival at the ranch, and ends with the brothers’ revelation that they are part of something much bigger, and that they always have been. With this revelation, the brothers are left with a choice. To become officially indoctrinated into the world of the OI, thus leaving their old lives behind, or to return to their old lives and forget about the OI. They choose to be indoctrinated, and the PILOT episode ends - but the mysteries and adventures of Keystone Ranch and the OI, are just beginning!
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Rated this logline
Thank you for your feedback Michael W. Orick. I understand and agree with what you're saying. The storyline that this logline is for, is a mystery/adventure, set in an ideal-ish version of our world, hence no "big" problem(s) for this story initially. But, the existential problem to this story/world is through a parallel story taking place in the same world. These two stories will eventually clash in an epic final combined story. I've posted the loglines for that story, as well as for the overarching story, to my profile. I finally have them ready. Good timing on your part! Thanks again, and I look forward to more feedback, should you have any.
I understand. Hence, two different series inside of an overarching "Universe".
Rated this logline
Thanks Michael W. Orick, excellent feedback. I've tweaked the end of the logline and would love to know what you think. Does it get me any closer in your opinion?
Michael W. Orick, yeah, I don't like it either. Ultimately the theme is both man and mankind struggling to fulfill their destiny, while darker forces stand in their way. I'm just having a hard time weaving that together with the plot to form a cohesive logline. I suppose that's the trick!
Michael W. Orick I loved that movie! But I certainly don't fall into the typical demographic for a Hollywood blockbuster, so that figures. I do take your point though. Nobody's signing up to make a sequel, right? How about Bladerunner though? That was initially a bust due to it's thematic complexity, but ended up a cult classic. Any case to be made there?