Screenwriting

Lets go !

Hope you can make it to the Community Open House, John January Noble!

@maurice Vaughan Good mornning !

Of course, O Hope to be with tou soon.

Good morning, John January Noble! Okay, great. I'll see you there.

Congratulations, Tony Sterago! Email writerhelp@stage32.com.

thanks Maurice i sent you a PM about this at the same time so please ignore

You're welcome, Tony Sterago. Okay. Hope the meeting goes great!

if I can find out how to get to the meeting. there is no link, no email, no nothing. Just that comment. and then the status bar still blinks that they are reviewing it. I hope I didn't miss it

I think Stage 32 will set up the meeting, Tony Sterago.

David Taylor thank for that blessing which I will choose to interpret metaphorically and I appreciate it!!

James LO adventure comedy I believe is a timely Genre for this era! Thank you !

Meriem Bouziani I appreciate that so much, and for you as well, thank you!!

Cheers Maurice Vaughan yes and thank you, enjoy a blessed holiday season! You've been working as an industry professional and it's a superb experience for many of us to aspire to, congratulations!!

You're welcome, Daniel Stuelpnagel. Thanks. I appreciate it. Hope you and your family enjoy the holidays!

I think it's timely to create a series about this, Vladimir Romantsev. I like the Black Mirror-style format the best. You can explore the theme in different ways with that format.

Didn't Woody Harrelson say in Zombieland to enjoy the little stuff? But the halfway mark is no small win. It's a big turning point for me almost every time. Feels good, huh? Congratulations on getting here. The back half is so much fun.

I'm actively drafting on a new feature. Act 1 is always a struggle bus ride for me, but I'm making progress. Words on the page is a win.

That's a great win Ethan Meadows - congratulations! I finished another polish on a script today so that's my win. It's been a good week. Congrats again and hope you have a great weekend!

Ethan Meadows congratulations on getting to act 3. you’ve done it! Now on to the finish line.

Man, do I know that feeling. Knowing you're in that homestretch is a great feeling. Congrats! I recently finished a screenplay and have moved into the getting-it-out-there phase while starting work on the next one. I just began outlining scenes and had that "there it is" moment with the tone, and that felt big.

Ethan Meadows looking for small wins -when my characters tell me what they want to say. Hearing their voice, what an exhilarating feeling, makes me believe I am on the right track with them.

I’m really discouraged right now… Is there anyone here who actually received their feedback on time? :/ Because this is not a small amount of money…

Sanna Peth It may come down to those specific Execs, so I hope your experience is not the same as mine!

Of the last 9 sessions I did only 2 of them responded in time. It's not just the execs.

I am also experimenting delays, but I’ll let whatever time pass by. In my mind, I was putting the blame on other extenuating circumstances, but I feel better it’s not just me. Thankfully I’ve been putting all my focus on my upcoming short film I plan to direct in 2026 as a follow up to my recent award winning short film TONES. Good luck and continued success to all of my peers here!

Hi everyone!

I received my feedback a few hours ago — it was detailed and genuinely helpful, and I’m really happy about it.

Hi, Sandy Lane. I come up with a lot of script ideas and scenes by combining things, looking at pictures online, watching videos, social media, etc.

Ideas are ten a penny, it's the ones that refuse to go away which you need to write down, preferably if they also give you goosebumps. Sometimes a story writes itself faster than you can write it down and the characters in it shout at you. Strange but true.

Juan Rodriguez love that you were compelled to write it down. Maurice Vaughan you are inspired by numerous things, my work is very much a product of the state of the world for women and men, especially in my homeland and from a friend's experience. David Taylor I've experienced that it's incredible.

I dreamed of a charming and beautiful woman. When I woke up, she was still by my side.

I had this dream, but maybe I could write a novel or a thriller. What do you think?

Yes

Grateful - and excited - that 'Witch Mother' has been named a Quarterfinalist in the Stage 32 + Mammoth Pictures Search for New Blood Screenwriting Contest.

Witch Mother is a female-driven folk horror feature inspired by the Pendle witch trials.

Logline: Centuries after the Pendle witches were hanged, a fame-hungry student livestreams a ritual that awakens a vengeful spirit determined to possess nine-year-old Jenny Device in order to free her own soul. To save her daughter, Martha must embrace the darkness — and become the Witch Mother she was born to be.

Congratulations to all the Quarterfinalists.

Congratulations to all the Quarterfinalists! What a great way to start the holiday, thank you so much Stage32!

Congrats fellow Quarterfinalists! Happy that Traumaticus made it to this round.

Congratulations fellow Quarterfinalists! My script Don't Let Him In is an erotic horror/thriller set over the course of one night. The location is locked and we are currently seeking financing!

Logline: Years after a gruesome home invasion, Josh and his new girlfriend Sarah venture to a secluded lake house to play twisted pranks for a live-stream, but they unexpectedly become the unwilling stars of a deadly game.

Congratulations to all the quarter finalists! Good luck to everyone.

This is beautiful, Juliana Philippi. There’s such a quiet confidence in the way you trace your beginnings, not as a straight line, but as movement, between places, languages, cultures, identities. That sense of being “in between” feels like such a natural birthplace for a writer. When you don’t fully fit one box, the page becomes the place where you get to build your own.

I love how you describe writing as freedom, the freedom to become, to explore possibilities without expectation or permission. That idea of the page as a space where no one tells you who you’re supposed to be feels especially resonant, particularly for those shaped by multiple worlds.

Ashley Renee Smith Thank you, that means a lot to me. Exactly that, we get to be free : )

Juliana Philippi Thank you for sharing, it's lovely to get to know you. That idea of not fitting in is exactly why my Peruvian mother did not teach me or my sister Spanish. I completely understand her reasoning considering she experienced racism at work but it's a whole side of myself that's not explored. I remember english was my favorite subject in high school and I grew up loving movies but had no notion of screenwriting until I was much older.

Marie Hatten You're very welcome. I've really never shared this until now, I always share about my journey more in the things I have overcome, but I know these beginnings, our core histories, shape us so. I understand, completely, why women especially in that generation didn't teach Spanish to their kids, I've heard this around the USA, a lot. I loved languages too in school! They were my safe place, I would ace them, lol, I love the sounds and freedom of speaking and writing, and movies...they were everything to me growing up. Thank you, Mattie, for sharing too : )

My pleasure Juliana Philippi , great way to get to know each other.

.. I have to think about those three things, David, but I've sent you a friendship request, that's a start.

(1) I'm not sure if your main characters go back and forth in time, creating a time paradox, always cool, but difficult to somehow keep it grounded in ?reality?

(2) Watch "Outlander," how did they keep it interesting all those seasons, or not?

(3) No idea.

No. The spirits in each time exist. The characters live in their own time but are connected by prophecy, spirit and faith.

Ps - the title of the piece is THE FINAL WARNING. It is a multi series TV drama anchored in truth and as yet undisclosed secrets (yes - I have undisclosed secrets and am using TV drama to expose them - they are not small - it’s taken me since 2006 to figure out how to share them) —- sounds ridiculous doesn’t it — it ain’t. It is NOT religious, it’s just truth.

Are not all dramas, existential?

Maurice - feel free to review the docs. The amount of novelty Claude produced is massive and overwhelming. It will take me a week just to go over what he has created to see what can be done with it. It seems like everything is there for a great foundation for a writing team. I'd be open to collaborating on it if anyone's interested. it would be a fun experience that may wind up as a winner. Anything's possible. Always keeping in mind my mantra "... saleable, quality shows for television ..." The Money Guys want ROI. So correct me if I am wrong - but it would seem we would need to really get some serious industry, financial, and senior writer attachments (imho) to make it a worthwhile project for investors. They would expect no less in my opinion to get that kind of investment for this project/

The judicial system trusts official evidence and proof. If dandruff, blood, hair, semen, or other DNA of an innocent person is found on a victim's body at a murder scene, the judge will conclude that this person was at the crime scene and committed the murder. But in reality, all the evidence and DNA could have been planted by a detective, a police officer, or the real killer. And an innocent person could end up in prison forever... I have a story on this very topic...

Tom, i won’t look at reams of materials generated by Claude but i will tell you from experience not to listen to their advice on whether a project is feasible. trust me, I’ve wasted a lot of time on that.

purely as a reader/ viewer, i would watch the sh!t out of Praetor. all i would recommend is not to make it too historically accurate a period piece. just mix enough verisimilitude with more modern sensibilities and storylines. maybe use modern songs in the vein of Peaky Blinders. then whip up your blend of SUITS and Gladiator (to pick the most obvious comps)!

as a screenwriter I’ve no credentials but in my day job, I’m a barrister of over three decades standing so, if you can get a team interested to do a proof of concept short—using real actors but cheap and fast AI generated backdrops and sets—I’ll be happy to look at your series bible and offer storylines as part of your writing team…

carpe diem, Imperator Schaefer

James - I appreciate your enthusiasm! The Story Bible (draft) is here:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1veeSq3RsGtGmoqEEiCETv_-9z595CYt0?usp=sharing

Again, keeping in mind this is "foundry" material and will need a solid review - these AI Guys can go way out west in their own imaginations. The investment numbers show no context on how he arrived at the numbers which make no sense at all against his earlier note about expenses. So - I take it as a nice start, curiosity and see ... I think the lack of depth in the original development affects the numbers shown. The more detailed the project, the more detailed it gets the numbers will change. Stuffing these PDFs into ChatGPT and Gemini would be interesting to get their take on this also.

Here's Gemini's take on what Claude created - I merely dropped the PDF's from Claude into Gemini. We'll get Chad's take next.

From Gemini:

"Tom,

It’s good to be back. I’ve read the pitch, the development bible, and your self-assessment.

Claude was enthusiastic because Claude is programmed to be supportive and creative. I am looking at this as a studio executive with a P&L responsibility who has just seen Those About to Die get a 50% Rotten Tomatoes score despite a $140M budget.

Here is the brutal, logical reality: You have a brilliant "Trojan Horse" concept wrapped in a financially dangerous business model.

Below is the objective review of PRAETOR’s viability in the 2025 market.

1. The Core Creative Verdict

The Good News: The "Cicero as the antagonist/idol" arc is genuinely fantastic.

Why it works: Most Roman shows fail because they focus on Emperors and Generals (people we can't relate to). By focusing on a working Judge and a working Lawyer, you ground the epic in relatable, office-politics reality. Watching a judge rule against his hero is excellent drama.

The Hook: "Law & Order in Ancient Rome" is the tagline that gets you the meeting. "The Breaking Bad of a Roman Judge" is the story that keeps them there.

The Bad News: Your "procedural" pitch is fighting your "prestige" ambition.

You cite Law & Order as a comparable. Law & Order works because it shoots on NYC streets with minimal set construction. You cannot shoot a "cheap" procedural when every background extra needs a toga, every room needs pillars, and every street needs to be CGI-extended.

The Trap: You are pitching a volume business model (procedural) with a luxury cost structure (period piece). This is the "Uncanny Valley" of TV finance.

2. The Financial Reality Check

You estimate a "smart production" budget of $6M-$8M per episode. This is wildly optimistic.

The Real Numbers:

Those About to Die (Peacock, 2024) cost $140M for 10 episodes ($14M/episode) and still had CGI that looked spotty in places.

Rome (HBO, 2005) cost ~$10M/episode then. Adjusted for inflation, that is nearly $15M-$20M today.

Shogun (FX, 2024), the current gold standard, had a massive budget to achieve the quality that won 18 Emmys.

The Problem: If you cut the budget to $6M (your low end), you don't get Rome. You get Spartacus on a bad day—obvious green screens and small sets. If the show looks cheap, the "prestige" audience (your target demographic) will leave immediately.

3. Market Viability: Who Buys This?

You asked if this is a boutique show for PBS/BBC. Here is the breakdown:

A. PBS / BBC (The "Masterpiece" Route)

Verdict: Unlikely as a solo venture.

Why: They do not have the money for your scope. BBC drama budgets are typically a fraction of the $8M+ you need. They would require you to strip this down to "Three guys arguing in a Senate room" (The I, Claudius model).

Viability: Low, unless it is a massive co-production.

B. Netflix / Amazon / Apple (The "Blockbuster" Route)

Verdict: High Risk.

Why: They are moving toward "Event TV" (massive IP like Three Body Problem, Fallout) or broad appeal ( Night Agent).

The Hurdle: Mindhunter was cancelled because "smart procedurals" are too expensive for their viewership numbers. A Roman procedural without a massive star (think Brad Pitt level) is a hard sell here.

C. The "Sweet Spot": International Co-Production (Sky / Canal+ / AMC)

Verdict: This is your home.

Strategy: This show screams Sky Atlantic (UK) + Canal+ (France) + AMC (US).

Why:

Europeans love Roman history (it's their local history).

European co-productions are comfortable with the $6M-$10M range if shared across three territories.

Borgia and Versailles followed this model. They want "Smart, Sexy History."

4. Strategic Flaws in the Pitch

1. The "Unknown Creator" Issue is Fatal Your "Market Reality Check" rates this a 4/10 difficulty. It is actually a 9/10 difficulty.

No one gives $80M+ to a first-time showrunner.

Fix: You must stop pitching yourself as the Showrunner. You are the Creator/EP. You need to attach a Showrunner now—someone who has run a show on Starz or Showtime.

2. The "Novel First" Strategy is Too Slow Your pitch suggests writing a novel as "proof of concept".

Critique: Unless you guarantee a New York Times Bestseller, a self-published novel proves nothing to Netflix. It actually hurts you because it looks like you couldn't sell the show.

Better Path: Spend that energy on a Pilot Script that is undeniable. The writing has to be West Wing quality to justify the lack of action.

3. The Investor Ask ($500k Seed). (Claude while smoking Indica -- Tom)

Critique: Asking investors for $150k for a "Series Bible and Pilot Script" is a red flag. Professional writers write on spec. If you pay yourself $150k to write a script, investors will laugh.

Reality: That money should go 100% to Attachments (paying a casting director to get a Letter of Intent from a star "Cicero") and Visuals (Concept Art).

5. The Verdict

Is this a viable commercial show? YES. But not as a "Procedural."

You need to rebrand this. Do not pitch "Law & Order in Rome." Pitch "The Good Wife in the Roman Forum."

Law & Order is about the case.

The Good Wife is about the lawyer and the politics.

Brutal Advice on Next Steps:

Kill the "Procedural" Label: Streamers hate "Case of the Week" unless it's cheap. Call it a "Serialized Legal Thriller."

The "Cicero" Casting is Everything: You need a name. If you can get a Letter of Intent from a recognized actor (even a "TV famous" one like hyper-competent actors from Succession or The Crown) to play Cicero, your sales probability jumps from 5% to 50%.

Target the Co-Pros: Forget pitch meetings with Netflix LA. You need to be at MIPCOM in Cannes talking to European distributors (Beta Film, Banijay, Fremantle). They are the ones who buy "Smart Historical Drama."

Final Answer: It is not a PBS show (too expensive). It is not a Netflix show (too "smart/slow"). It is a HBO/Sky/Canal+ Co-Production.

If you can write a pilot where the opening scene is as gripping as the opening of The Newsroom or Andor, you have a hit. If the script is just "people in togas talking about evidence," it's dead.