Screenwriting

I am thrilled to announce that I have officially signed a Co-Writer Collaboration Agreement for the premium sci-fi pilot, 'THE PHOENIX'. I’ll be partnering with Lead Creator Jay A. Swendris to bring this high-stakes, 'Earth-themed' story to life.

We’ve already hit the ground running with the first polished pages, and the response has been incredible—even catching the eye of a potential financier before the year is up!

It’s an honor to be Jay's first choice on this journey. I'm looking forward to a massive 2026 as we move toward the 'Ocean Path' and beyond. Grateful for this community and the connections that make these projects possible.

Let’s get to work!

For me, it was the fall of my pro wrestling career.

I spent 27 years in the wrestling industry, performer, voice, and eventually the booker, the guy who writes the shows. I had everything I thought mattered: respect, a position people wanted, friendships that felt real in a very make-believe business, and a voice that people listened to.

And then it all disappeared.

The calls stopped.

The texts stopped.

My Facebook went silent.

On my birthday, I got two messages, one from my mother, and one from an ex I hadn’t spoken to in over 20 years.

I sat alone in a hotel room for two weeks, unsure how to continue living… or if I even wanted to. What hurt most wasn’t just losing the career, it was realizing I had lost myself somewhere along the way.

So I started writing.

I poured every ounce of anger, grief, regret, and fear onto the page. I didn’t outline my pain, I survived it sentence by sentence. And for the first time in years, I didn’t stop halfway through. I finished something.

That script , my first feature, is loosely based on my story. It’s imperfect, raw, and deeply personal. But it’s also the thing that reminded me who I was before the applause, before the titles, before the validation.

Losing everything is what finally pushed me to do the work I’d been afraid to do for years.

For me becoming a writer didn't start with inspiration, it started with having nothing left to lose.

Would love to hear everyone else’s moment.

Hi everyone!

I’m about to start writing a new TV series — I already have a solid first version of the show bible, but I’d love to stress-test it a bit before diving into the script.

Do you know of any tools or frameworks that help check the strength and completeness of a show bible?

Bonus points if it also helps structure a pitch deck from the same foundation.

Thanks a lot in advance! Happy to share notes if others are working on similar things.

I gave ChatGPT this prompt: I recently got a first ten-page review of my script from Stage32.com. That makes me wonder something, mostly because I have a different sense of humor. I'd like you to take on the role of a Stage32.com reviewer, and be fair but tough, as you analyze the first part of, say, Hamlet, by William Shakespeare. (This could be interesting.)

The output is amazing. (And it makes me feel better about my own results.)

This is interesting—and a good stress-test for taste and tone. I’ll take on a Stage 32–style First 10 Pages Script Coverage, aimed at being fair, professional, and a little tough. I’ll treat Hamlet as if it just landed in the submission queue today.

STAGE 32 FIRST 10 PAGES COVERAGE

Title: Hamlet

Writer: William Shakespeare

Format: Stage Play (would likely be evaluated today as a Feature or Limited Series pilot)

Genre: Tragedy / Psychological Drama

Pages Reviewed: Act I, Scene i–ii (approx. first 10 pages)

OVERALL IMPRESSION

PASS (with notable strengths)

The opening establishes mood and thematic ambition quickly, but the first pages lean heavily on dense dialogue, exposition, and tonal solemnity that may alienate a modern audience before the central dramatic engine fully ignites. There is clear mastery of language and atmosphere, but accessibility and pacing are immediate concerns.

CONCEPT & HOOK

The supernatural cold open—guards on watch encountering an unexplained apparition—is a strong conceptual hook. Starting with uncertainty, fear, and unanswered questions is effective and genre-forward, bordering on horror. That said, the hook is atmospheric rather than narrative. We don’t yet know whose story this is or why we should emotionally invest beyond curiosity.

From a Stage 32 perspective, the opening lacks a clear protagonist POV within the first few pages. Hamlet himself does not appear immediately, which delays audience alignment.

Strength: Immediate mystery and tone

Concern: Delayed emotional anchor

TONE & GENRE CONSISTENCY

The tone is relentlessly serious, somber, and formal. While appropriate for tragedy, there is virtually no tonal modulation early on—no levity, contrast, or rhythm changes. This can read as monotonous to contemporary readers, especially in a first-ten-page evaluation where engagement is critical.

There are moments of dry, situational irony later, but they do not surface early enough to signal range.

CHARACTER INTRODUCTIONS

The Guards (Bernardo, Francisco, Marcellus): Functionally effective but interchangeable. Their dialogue serves the plot rather than revealing individual personality.

Horatio: The most grounded presence so far. He acts as a rational observer, which is useful dramatically, though his skepticism is stated more than dramatized.

Claudius & Gertrude (Scene ii): Politically efficient but emotionally distant. Their relationship dynamics are implied rather than felt.

Hamlet: When he finally appears, his emotional state is clear, but his internal conflict is delivered in long, formalized speech rather than active behavior.

From a development standpoint, Hamlet is compelling, but he enters late and introspectively, which may test reader patience.

DIALOGUE

The dialogue is eloquent, elevated, and unmistakably confident. However, it is also:

Dense

Repetitive in emotional beats

More philosophical than dramatic

Characters frequently articulate themes directly rather than allowing subtext or action to carry meaning. In modern script terms, this would likely be flagged as “on-the-nose,” even though the language itself is impressive.

PACING & STRUCTURE

The first ten pages are heavy on:

Setup

World-building

Political and emotional context

There is minimal forward momentum in terms of plot escalation. The supernatural element helps, but it remains abstract rather than actionable at this stage. For a contemporary audience, the inciting incident feels postponed.

MARKETABILITY (MODERN CONTEXT)

In today’s marketplace, this would likely struggle unless:

Reimagined with a clearer genre frame (e.g., psychological thriller)

Streamlined in dialogue

Anchored sooner to a central POV

The material feels prestige-oriented but niche, and better suited to an audience already inclined toward classical or literary drama.

STRENGTHS

Strong thematic ambition (identity, truth, morality)

Confident voice

Effective atmosphere

Memorable central character once introduced

WEAKNESSES

Slow burn without early payoff

Dense, formal dialogue

Limited character differentiation early

Delayed protagonist focus

RECOMMENDATIONS

If this were a Stage 32 submission today, I would recommend:

Introducing Hamlet earlier or reframing the opening to tie the mystery directly to him.

Reducing dialogue density and allowing moments to breathe.

Finding tonal contrast earlier to maintain engagement.

Clarifying the central dramatic question within the first ten pages.

FINAL NOTE (Stage 32–Style)

There is undeniable talent and ambition here, but the opening prioritizes intellect over immediacy. With refinement and modernization, this could resonate strongly with the right audience—but in its current form, it asks a lot of the reader before giving them a reason to stay.

Hello Stage 32 community,

I’m currently developing a feature film concept centered on a young Algerian woman who dreams of becoming a fashion designer in Paris. The story explores creativity, cultural identity, ambition, and the emotional journey behind fashion design rather than glamour alone.

The screenplay is still in progress, and I would truly appreciate feedback, thoughts, or creative insights from fellow writers and filmmakers. Any perspective on the concept, themes, or direction would be very valuable at this stage.

Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts.

(Please keep in mind that this is done as it would be a script for a comic. I have a background in comics, so I use comic terms for the script. I do hope to get this made as a movie or short TV show. I'm looking for feedback on the pages. If you can take the time to read and leave a review in the comments, replace panels with shots.)

Chapter 6 Page 1

The Castle in the Sky

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 1 - Wide Panel)

A wide, panoramic shot shows Garna, the giant, walking along a massive stone path leading toward the enchanted castle in the sky. The sky is tinged with deep blues and purples, giving the setting an otherworldly, dreamlike quality. The castle is still in the distance, towering over the landscape like a forgotten relic of ancient power. Garerit, hidden within the tree's branches, peers out carefully, his expression a mix of curiosity and apprehension. The tree sways slightly with Garna's movements, but the tailor holds on tight, making sure he isn't spotted.

SB (Narration - Caption): "As the castle loomed ahead, the tailor saw the world of giants stretch before him- massive, ancient, and perilous."

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 2 - Wide Panel)

A glimpse into the inside of the enchanted castle's land reveals towering, massive stone structures that seem barely suitable for anyone smaller than a giant. Inside the gates, giants patrol the area—some standing guard, others relaxing near enormous stone tables, feasting and sharpening weapons. Their booming voices rise in laughter and conversation, giving the castle an alive yet threatening atmosphere. Several giants are loudly conversing as they guard and oversee their captives. The castle's magical aura intensifies here, and the stark contrast between the giants' immense size and the small figure of the tailor underscores the monumental challenge Garerit faces.

SB (Narration - Caption): "Within the castle, giants roam freely, their presence an ever-looming threat to those trapped here. Some are more dangerous than others."

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 3 - Medium Panel)

The giants are scattered along the path, some sitting on large stone ledges, while others sharpen their weapons or haul massive supplies toward the castle. Their voices boom like rolling thunder, and their presence makes the tailor more cautious.

Garna - Dialogue Bubble: "Ah-ha! Borik! Still eating more than you fight, I see! Hah!"

Borik - Dialogue Bubble: "And you, Garna, still carrying twigs instead of real weight!"

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 4 - Medium Panel)

A medium panel shows Garerit peeking from behind a tree branch, trying to stay unnoticed as the giants go about their business. His expression is focused, and there's a determined look in his eyes. The giants are mostly unaware of his presence, busy with their affairs. The tailor's observation of these giants introduces the danger they represent, but also hints at the potential strategy Garerit may employ to outwit them.

SB (Garerit - Thought Bubble): "More giants... if I'm to succeed, I'll need to be clever."

SB (Garerit - Thought Bubble): "It's time to use my wits. I must avoid getting caught." (CUT?)

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 5 - Close-Up Panel)

A close-up shot of Garerit shows him watching through the branches, his face partially hidden by pine needles. His eyes dart between the giants, trying to remain unseen. His grip tightens on the tree, and a single bead of sweat forms on his forehead as he realizes just how many giants are here.

SB (Garerit - Thought Bubble): "There are too many of them... I can't let them find me."

(Ch6 Pg1 Panel 6 - Wide Panel)

As Garna moves, the castle in the sky comes fully into view as it breaks through the clouds. The structure is colossal, with spiraling towers, ornate bridges of shimmering stone, and glowing runes carved into its walls. A mysterious blue-green light pulses from its windows, and spectral chains drape across sections of the castle, hinting at ancient magic and imprisoned souls. The clouds swirl around its base, adding to its eerie majesty. Garerit's eyes widen in awe and trepidation as he sees it up close for the first time. He grips the tree bark tighter, feeling the weight of his situation.

SB (Narration - Caption): "The enchanted castle stood before him, an eerie fortress of power and mystery. Whatever lay inside, it was not meant for the likes of men."

Ch6 Pg 2

(Ch6 Pg2 Panel 1 - Wide Shot)

The castle doors loom before them, massive and adorned with arcane symbols. The air is thick with magic, swirling with glowing embers that drift like fireflies. Standing on the front steps is EliDoras, a tall, regal figure in flowing dark robes, his long silver hair cascading past his shoulders. His eyes glow unnaturally, and he holds a gilded staff, crackling with latent magic. Several other creatures, a fox with human-like eyes, a haggard old cow, and a massive hound with strange intelligence-stand nearby, watching. The fox, cow, and dog stand together, their features now more refined and humanoid. Their faces retain their animal characteristics, muzzles, ears, and fur-but their bodies are structured like those of humans, with proper limbs, posture, and clothing fitting their roles in the castle. The Fox: A slender figure with keen, intelligent eyes, dressed in a fine tunic and cloak, giving the impression of a cunning court official or a scholar. The Cow: A broad-shouldered individual with strong arms, wearing a simple yet practical outfit suited for physical labor, resembling a farmer or stable master. The Dog: Standing with a firm yet attentive posture, clad in a guard's uniform, exuding loyalty and duty, as if once a knight or castle guard before the curse.

(Ch6 Pg2 Panel 2 - Medium Shot - First Words Exchanged)

EliDoras smirks, looking down at Garerit, clearly amused by the tailor's small stature compared to Garna. Garna laughs heartily, unaware of the tension.

EliDoras (Dialogue - Cold and Calculating): "A tailor? In my domain? You must be more than you seem... or exceptionally foolish."

Garerit (Keeping His Cool, Responds Wryly): "They say the best tailors weave more than thread, my lord."

(Ch6 Pg2 Panel 3 - Close-Up)

The fox, cow, and hound exchange glances, their eyes filled with silent desperation. Garerit notices their strange behavior, sensing something is wrong.

(Ch6 Pg2 Panel 4 - Medium Shot)

EliDoras gestures toward the animals, a smirk playing on his lips. Garerit's expression hardens, gripping the strap of his satchel tightly. The fox takes a hesitant step forward, as if pleading.

EliDoras (Casual, Almost Bored): "They were once men and women, like yourself. A simple precaution. If my guests cannot run, they cannot leave."

Updated Logline:

When an intake officer vanishes inside a trauma-recording facility and the system rewrites the room as “NOT ADMITTED,” a guilt-haunted intake lead and his small team must write human-first rules faster than the building can optimize pain into repeatable patterns—before their cases are exported as a “standard model” that turns suffering into policy.

Contained institutional horror/drama set in a handful of locations (Intake Room 7-B, Control Room, Archive, Meeting Room). Horror comes from tiny UI and language shifts—forms, dropdowns, status fields—treated like haunted objects. The building’s only “voice” at first is a low HUM that changes with moral choices.

Season 1 spine (9 episodes = 9 “modules” the House uses to manage pain):

EP01 The Cart — disappearance + the first rule: no auto-admissions; blank line = unresolved, not deleted.

EP02 The Tab — the House starts “charging” comfort like debt (heat/light/privacy).

EP03 The Ration — care becomes rationing; bodies pay first.

EP04 The Watcher — “consent vs spectacle” as the House pushes “high impact” clips.

EP05 The Host — language/PR becomes a weapon for protection, not spin.

EP06 The Guest — the institution invites the wrong kind of “help.”

EP07 The Archive — analog logs vs digital rewriting.

EP08 The Echo — the system starts looping patterns of harm.

EP09 The Inheritance — who holds the keys, and what “ethical recording” costs.

What I want honest feedback on:

1. Does the updated logline finally make the goal + stakes clear?

2. Is the engine sustainable for multiple seasons (modules / policy fights / moral cost)?

3. Would you push this more supernatural or keep it “bureaucratic horror” grounded?

4. Any better comps than Severance × The Grudge for pitching?

If you’re open to it, I’m happy to DM a 1-page series overview or the pilot.

Most writers build far more than a single script — we create worlds.

Rules. Canon. Continuity. Characters. Histories. Maps. Lore.

And most of that work ends up scattered across drafts, notebooks, and versions.

A while back, I realized something important:

If a world is structured, it can be protected.

If it can be protected, it can be expanded.

And if it can be expanded, it can function as a real asset.

So I took my own unpublished literary works — the scripts, bibles, world documents, and continuity systems — and formalized them through three steps:

✅ 1. Copyright (fixation + registration)

Once the work is fixed in tangible form, it’s protected.

Registration simply creates a public record of authorship.

✅ 2. UCC‑1 Filing

This doesn’t transfer ownership — it publicly records a security interest in the IP.

It’s a way of saying: this creative work is being treated as structured collateral.

✅ 3. Assignment Agreement

This is where the rights are organized.

It identifies the works, defines the rights, and allocates them to the entity that manages the asset.

Together, these steps helped me build what I call Intellectual Property‑Backed Security Entitlements (IPBSEs) — a framework designed to help creators organize and protect the structured elements of their worlds as a cohesive asset, rather than leaving them scattered across drafts, notes, and versions.

This doesn’t change how a creator works.

It simply gives shape to what they’re already building.

If you’re a writer who builds worlds with rules, canon, and continuity, I’d love to hear how you organize your universe — and whether you’ve ever thought about treating it as a unified asset.