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Which logline do you think is better and makes you want to read the script more?
1) A meek father on the outs with his family, takes them on a desert camping trip to reconnect. But when they witness a professional hit, the father must save his family as the skilled hitmen hunt them throughout the mer...
Expand postTwo, and it needs a tune up ... mild mannered and unassuming father makes him sound like a dad who has hidden skills that will be revealed (aka: Taken or Nobody). How's this, " ... after professional...
Expand commentthe second, definitely. I would put a full stop after “killer” and start the next sentence with “They must survive…” it quickens the pacing a bit and adds a sense of urgency.
We all want to create characters that are interesting. One way is to have a character seem to be two contradictory things at once. I love this video below where Gene Wilder talks about getting the director to allow him to change his character's entrance so that from then on we don't know if we (and...
Expand postThis would work for a character in a script I'm outlining, Tucker Teague. Thanks for sharing the video!
When I started writing Yohana's World, I didn’t care who Yohana was going to face. Basically, who the killer was.
I cared what had to break inside her before she saw it.
In most thrillers, the villain hides behind masks, certain clues and misdirection.
In Yohana’s World, the villain hides in her past.
T...
Expand postI haven't written a story where my protagonist was the real antagonist, Ansh J., but I like that idea. Thanks.
Hey Fellow Screenwriters,
If you’re like me, this past week was a sprint to wrap things up so we could actually enjoy the long weekend. We celebrated yesterday, and now… it’s that perfect sweet spot in the weekend — a little downtime to do something for ourselves as filmmakers.
This is the perfect tim...
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Hi everyone,
I am currently developing two socially-minded feature film projects and would love to hear your honest feedback on the synopsis below. Both films are deeply personal and aim to highlight untold stories from Southeast Asia, focusing on language inequality and human trafficking.
Project 1...
Expand postThanh Trung Nguyen Also, I’m a Stage 32 Lounge Moderator. I wanted to let you know I moved your post from the Authoring & Playwriting Lounge to the Screenwriting Lounge since you're asking for feedbac...
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(Please note that this is done as it would be a script for a comic, I have a background in comics, so I use comic terms for the script. I do hope to get this made as a movie or short TV show. I'm looking for feedback on the pages, if you can take the time to read and leave a review in the comments....
Expand postI like the scene, Gregory Barone. I could picture the scene easily ("Garerit climbs over rocky terrain, eyes scanning ahead. A dark cave entrance looms before him, jagged like the maw of a beast..."),...
Expand commentI think you should, Gregory Barone.
(Please note that this is done as it would be a script for a comic, I have a background in comics, so I use comic terms for the script. I do hope to get this made as a movie or short TV show. I'm looking for feedback on the pages, if you can take the time to read and leave a review in the comments....
Expand postI like that you wrote a scene to set up the cave of the giants, Gregory Barone. It gives the reader a feeling of dread. And I like that the challenges Garerit has to face get more difficult as the sto...
Expand commentMaurice Vaughan so nothing to fix here?
I don't see anything that needs to be fixed, Gregory Barone.
This is incredible, Pat Alexander! It's going to come in handy when I pitch, especially The Graf and The Game. Thanks for sharing this.
Good quote: "The number one mistake I see is people telling me what they’re AIMING for with their story, whether it be audience, theme, or effect. I’ll hear things like, “It’s about a group of 20 some...
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Stage 32 is having a virtual panel featuring some of the top minds in the Stage 32 community to discuss the current state of Sci-Fi and Fantasy!
July 16th at 10:00 A.M. PDT / 1:00 P.M. EDT
Join live and ask questions!
Find out more and sign up for free here: www.stage32.com/education/products/stage-32-...
Expand postHi, Stephanie O'Leary. I'm not sure if there will be a "day of" email reminder, but I saved this post, and I'll comment on it the day of to remind you.
I will most likely be in field research but hopefully our ships network will be able to stream the event..!
Hope you'll be able to join live, James Boyd Fuller. If not, you'll be able to watch the recording when it's available if you sign up.
You're welcome, Stephanie O'Leary.
Congratulations to our Winner in this year's Female Driven Screenwriting Contest! ALEXANDRA FISHER with her script SEA OF SOULS! Let's show her our support, and if you're placed, tell us more about your scripts!
See the placements here: https://www.stage32.com/happy-writers/contests/4th-Annual-Fema...
Expand postCongratulations on winning, Alexandra! Congratulations to everyone who entered and everyone who placed!
Congratulations Alexandra, that’s fantastic. I am curious about the story behind “Sea of Souls” and I love the title. Pat Alexander, there’s a chance for us to know the Logline? Congratulations to eve...
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I had the most illuminating lunch yesterday with a literary manager who represents some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Between bites of overpriced salad, they dropped some serious knowledge bombs that completely shifted how I think about the current film landscape. I couldn't wait to share these...
Expand postThank you, Geoffroy Faugerolas, for sharing with us your tasty lunch. :) It's always good to know about industry tendencies. For Studios, the budget range is a perfect fit, but for indie films, it isn...
Expand commentWe may have confused the definition of a 'studio' picture in some of these comments. Not a lot of major Hollywood studios are interested in $15-25 million features, especially with big name talent, as...
Expand commentThere seems to be some bad info here Geoffroy Faugerolas .... Could you weigh in on 2 points?
1. You state that "scripts are selling for $2M to over $15M?!" Perhaps that is the entire budget for the fi...
Expand commentGeoff Harris Bottom line is it's all about quality of the work. You have a nice resume so excuse me for being cynical. I'm doing things my way because I've listened to the so called "experts" in the i...
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That's tough, @Wyman. Here's one of my favorite loglines: After a disobedient teen and her mom move to a small town, the family and a neighbor try to escape from a living house that wants a daughter, wife, and live-in maid.