THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES

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SIGHT BEYOND SIGHT
By Tony D. Pindrock

GENRE: Thriller, Horror
LOGLINE:

A tough Biker Chick with sight into the spiritual realm and armed only with a flaming sword is thrust into battle with Fallen Angels whose agenda is to impregnate the women in her town with their abominated offspring known as the Nephilim.


 

SYNOPSIS:

Imagine if you could see into a realm that coincides right along with our physical existence. A realm where all angelic and demonic activity takes place, and you were armed with a flaming ruby sword to battle the evil deity. A person would be deemed crazy, right? Well, welcome to the world of Sara Bach.

An earthquake tremor, caused by a midnight ritual of a ruby sword, unleashes fallen angels known as The Watchers unto the town of Black Hollow, Montana. Their mission is to pollute the human race with their abominated offspring such as they did in the ancient days of Enoch, know as the Nephilim.

Sara Bach, a tough biker and ex army ranger is in a mining accident caused by the tremor. Her head injury gives her sight into the spiritual realm. She meets Briathos, her guardian who arms her with a flaming sword and educates her to the ways of demonic warfare. A task Sara declines at first, but eventually accepts her destiny.

The town and her friends think she’s crazy. No one believes her except for the town’s priest and Barnabas Crone, the man who conjured up the Watchers. He surrenders the ruby sword to the priest who later passes it on to Sara.

The leader of the Watchers is Samyaza. He and his crew have won over the town by posing as Mining Officials who will reopen the mine. Their plan is in motion despite Sara’s attempts to expose them. Women are impregnated and every man that goes into the mine becomes possessed by a Watcher.

A town jubilee sets the stage for the final showdown between Sara and Sam. Her guardian is forced to flee which leaves Sara to battle the Watchers on her own. She is surrounded and doom seems apparent, but Sara closes her eyes and raises her sword. She remembers her lessons and victory is only a plunge of her sword away, but as one mission ends… another begins.

Noel Thompson

I like the logline, it's just a bit long. I try to make it able to say in one breath. So maybe:

An ex-army ranger wielding a flaming ruby sword defends her town against fallen angels who are trying to take over the natural world.

I like the visual of a flaming red sword, but you could also focus on the second part of the forbidden union.

An ex-army ranger must decide if she will form a forbidden spiritual union to save her town from fallen angels.

I can sense you want to include ALL the super cool elements in the logline, but that's not the point of the logline. It's: protagonist+world+problem+stakes. Think about an executive reading through loglines all day and they're just looking for the supernatural ones (or female protag., or grounded, or sci-fi) the logline helps them weed out/in. Cheers!

Tasha Lewis

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