Composing

Last night I enjoyed myself at the Crowded House in concert at Cardiff Castle. As a family we have a long-lasting love of their music and so my son and daughter bought myself and my soulmate tickets to the show.

I have valued Neil Finn’s mastery of songwriting, but here I want to focus on one elemen...

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I have valued Neil Finn’s mastery of songwriting, but here I want to focus on one element of that; his lyricism. For this I’d like to look at this wordsmith in action with one of Crowded House’s most beloved songs - Fall at Your Feet.

I'm really close tonight

And I feel like I'm moving inside her

Lying in the dark

And I think that I'm beginning to know her

Let it go

I'll be there when you call

And whenever I fall at your feet

You let your tears rain down on me

Whenever I touch, your slow turnin' pain

You're hidin' from me now

There's somethin' in the way that you're talkin'

The words don't sound right

But I hear them all moving inside you

Know

I'll be waiting when you call

Hey, whenever I fall at your feet

Won't you let your tears rain down on me?

Whenever I touch, your slow turnin' pain

The finger of blame has turned upon itself

And I'm more than willing to offer myself

Do you want my presence or need my help?

Who knows where that might lead

I fall

Whenever I fall at your feet

Won't you let your tears rain down on me?

Whenever I fall (at your feet)

Whenever I fall

This is a haunting song and in the performance last night, there was an obvious emotional connection with the audience.

As a screenwriter, I look at how Neil Finn constructs the story with a poetic and not matter of fact manner. “Won’t you let your tears fall down on me? Whenever I touch your slow turning pain.” We can all probably connect with that sense of a partner’s hurt and to ‘move inside’ them and experience their pain. The music is a kind of therapy, moving us to a connection he with that moment of melancholy in our lives.

That’s what good songwriting can do and also that is what we need to do as screenwriters too; we need to move our audience towards the screen and the characters on it. I’ve been writing for 15 years and I’ve learnt to pare down my dialogue.

In the early days I was sure I had to let the audience know everything that was on a characters mind, I had to explain it clearly to those watching. BUT, then the penny dropped, people don’t talk like they were in a Shakespearean play, we speak in clipped sentences and if there is tension, then the dialogue should reflect that with a terseness and directness that grabs hold of us and makes us watch the action unfolding through the dialogue. Yes, dialogue is action!

We need to move from writing rhetorically to poetically; for in this way we learn the wisdom of paring down our language. Rhetoric is meant to show off, to flaunt our mastery of language, but the poetic is about distilling it with the paradox of directness through metaphor.

And that is where the skill comes in, to learn that less is more and more can be decidedly less. If you are writing dialogue, learn from the songwriters and poets to edit well, until you have distilled that dialogue into an emotional force. That, as Neil Finn knows, is where the power of good storytelling lays.

https://youtu.be/2ROiU9kOHeE?si=4GTPvnQigsG14K2H

I had a company show interest in my music samples (SoundCloud) and I'm looking into making / creating a longer version(s).

It seems like a small undertaking, though ... I'm up for it ! :~)

This is my dilema; I found the midi / Notation version and the Logic Pro version. The notation version is the s...

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Kerry Kennard

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2 people like this
- Maurice Vaughan
- Amanda Toney
1 day ago

Seems more big companies are involved also …

( the Plaintiffs). Sony and UMG.

I don’t blame them - copyright is important for a lot of their Artists and current music.

AI is a great tool, though we ne...

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Maurice Vaughan

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1 person likes this
- Kerry Kennard
10 hours ago

It's gonna take governments, huge companies (like Sony Music Entertainment, Universal Music Group, and Warner Records), small companies, and creatives to protect against AI copyright infringement and...

Linwood Bell

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4 people like this
1 week ago

You're talking Goldsmith, Herrmann, Steiner, Cleave, etc. You know they got the do re mi.

Brandy Camille

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3 people like this
4 days ago

There are many great projects where there are multiple composers involved. As long as pay and credits are equitable, I don't really see the issue with it.

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2 people like this
- Maurice Vaughan
- Brandy Camille
2 days ago

As Brandy Camille suggests, I don't see a problem with it, as long as all are credited and paid. I might want to make sure we get along well before starting the Project....

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2 people like this
- Amanda Toney
- Maurice Vaughan
2 days ago

I would think so; Jerskin seems to have a way to write for both his emotions and/ or the emotions of the characters. As I grow in knowledge how to write, I would think the Latter is a better way to write, though I would think my emotions might get in the way sometimes.

Mark Deuce

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3 people like this
1 week ago

Perfect teaching Maurice Vaughan and perfect timing.

Ashley Renee Smith

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2 people like this
- Mark Deuce
- Maurice Vaughan
3 days ago

Thank you for sharing, Maurice Vaughan!

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1 person likes this
- Mark Deuce
3 days ago

You're welcome, Ashley Renee Smith. Samuel and Michael give excellent advice and insight.

Beautiful music!!

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1 person likes this
- Maurice Vaughan
3 days ago

Thank you for sharing, Linwood Bell! I've never seen this film before.

Amazing!! I saw the 25th Anniversary Nightmare Before Christmas performance at the Hollywood Bowl with Elfman, Burton, and the whole cast. It was one of the best nights of my life. I'm sure your nephew will remember that experience with you always.

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Miquiel Banks

Yeah, Crowded House definitely has powerful Lyrics and actually, their Biggest Hit, Don't Dream It's Over, has one of my 80s ANTHEMS.....

Don't Let Them WIN!!!!!!

Thanks for Sharing....

Geoff Hall

Miquiel Banks thank you, Miquiel!!

Great tip, Geoff Hall ("If you are writing dialogue, learn from the songwriters and poets to edit well, until you have distilled that dialogue into an emotional force"). I've learned that less is more...

2
2 people like this
- Ashley Renee Smith
- Maurice Vaughan
1 week ago

Maurice Vaughan thank you, Maurice and indeed, when writing a monologue you slip from the poetical to the rhetorical. It’s all about the fullness of language. I want it to grab people’s attention and...

2
2 people like this
- Ashley Renee Smith
- Geoff Hall
1 week ago

You're welcome, Geoff Hall. You're right about monologues. I've never heard of Crowded House. I'll have to listen to them when I write a script. Have a great weekend too.

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1 person likes this
- Ashley Renee Smith
2 weeks ago

Incredible score, Linwood Bell! It reminds me of family-friendly movies I watched growing up.

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2 people like this
- Ashley Renee Smith
- Maurice Vaughan
2 weeks ago

Maurice Vaughan He's great. Benjamin Button and The Shape of Water are a couple favorites. Good movies, too. :)

I've been meaning to watch The Shape of Water, Linwood Bell. I saw a little of Benjamin Button (I think the opening scene, maybe on YouTube). That movie's on my watchlist too. Looking forward to heari...

Yes, Linwood Bell , great orchestration all the way through. I like the transitions with the strings and oboe. During school(s) - I took a Brass class and learned horn - which is also in sections of t...

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1 person likes this
- Maurice Vaughan
1 week ago

Absolutely beautiful, Linwood Bell! I haven't watched The Boys in the Boat yet, but I'll have to move it up my list.

Thanks, Maurice. I still need to do the extended work on those instrumentals. (It would be good to know what a good length is for Sync / movies. Standard song length (3:15-3:30) ?? Some Syncs are good at 2:30 +, right ??

Some Docs are probably better at 4- 5 mins ?

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2 people like this
- Amanda Toney
- Ashley Renee Smith
1 week ago

You're welcome, Kerry Kennard. Sorry, I'm not sure.

A piece at 2:30 to 3:00 is good and think of edit points so someone can chop a 30 or 60 out of it for commercial work. You should join something like TAXI and force yourself to do a brief or two a mon...

Yes - :30 & :60 edit points. - thanks for the reminder.

Congratulations, Kerry Kennard! That's awesome!

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