Screenwriting : New horror short! by Paul Mitchell

Hey everyone! I've turned one my writing excercises into an eight page short based on a Japanese urban legend. I'm looking for some feedback, anything will help and yes I know there's a writers room but Paul is broke right now  lol! I'm willing to read in return. Its called "The Stall" its definitely a "midnight" category type of story and it is on my logline page to read. Thanks again!!