I never have writer's block. Never.
But this play... whoooooo boy it's a struggle.
I've been commissioned to write a play about my personal experiences with things that happened in my past. And while I normally speak openly about them (I'm an activist, I give talks, I organise outreach programs, I work with charities), I am really really struggling to find the words this time.
That's a new experience for me.
I love writing plays in a different way than I love writing scripts or prose. It's just its own beast, its own completely unique adventure. And it holds a special place in my heart, because a play was the first thing I ever wrote... the first thing that was ever produced.
But I haven't written for the stage in so long.
So where is this coming from?
Is it (quite literally) stage fright? Is it that the material is too close to my heart? Is it a fear of failure because this commission means the actual WORLD to me?
how do you cope,and what are your go to methods to fight this?
2 people like this
Its possible that confronting your past is causing anxiety/fear and all these negative emotions, and you may confuse this with fear of failure or writing issues. Even if youve given talks and feel comfortable, sitting and stewing in it as a writer can be emotionally difficult. I had a similar experience, except I was on mushrooms lol. It was not pretty.
1 person likes this
I look through the lens of an impartial bystander, observing someone else's life, flaws and all, even if it's my own. Right now, I'm outlining a new script about a kid based on myself at 14. It's not easy, but also kind of freeing knowing that I'm putting some truth out there. For me, I have to treat it just like any other story. Hoping that make sense!
2 people like this
Congratulations on landing a project with such meaning and personal stakes!!
I think you are spot on - it's because you care and this is your own personal story.
I have bouts of imposter syndrome all the time, and sometimes feel stunted on projects where I know exactly what to do, but am thinking in my head too much.
My suggestion is to take it one step at a time. With a bare-bones outline first, and a list of the most important takeaways you'd like the audience to know/feel from your story.
Would it be helpful to look through old journals or diaries to get your thoughts in order?
You can absolutely do this!!!
2 people like this
Don't overthink it.
Just write with reckless abandon.
They'll be plenty of opportunities during the workshop phase to refine your work. Maybe the Theatre that has commissioned the play has an in-house dramaturge? That's another resource you can leverage if required.
2 people like this
Understandable. Looking back at our lives can be daunting, especially if you regret something, or have experienced trauma, but I agree with the comment on journals. I've kept a blog since 2003 and it's helpful for jogging my memory on details. Maybe treat it like you're writing about somebody else, that might be a good start. First organise your thoughts. Any occasions stand out that you feel have moulded you in some way, or changed your perspective? Anything funny happen, or incredibly sad, or just plain weird? Any incident or event you've written down in a speech? Notes you've written? Chat conversations that you've saved? Emails? Facebook posts or tweets? All these things need to be put into groups of which event they reference, then laid in chronological order, say on index cards. That's your timeline sorted. Seeing it laid out should make the rest should be simple. Are you able to add a bit of drama, squeeze in or tweak dialogue to make it more interesting? I think it's safe to say it depends how much you want to share. Are you okay with people knowing spicier details if there were any? And if there aren't, are you willing to invent some if needs be?
1 person likes this
Ronika Merl, you said, "But I haven't written for the stage in so long." It could be you just need more practice. Maybe write a short stage play to get back into the swing of things.
3 people like this
I think Robert Russo is on to something here. I am reading your memoir and finding it not only incredibly well written, so much so I honestly think you should be looking for publication at this point, but also it is very moving and personal. You have quite literally put your heart on the page. You are taking a huge emotional risk and although you were suggesting you need a good editor to take away, or as you put it, kill some of your little darlings, I don't see how you can leave much of this material out without losing the story. My honest advice, knowing where you were coming from on this, is to finish and publish your memoir. Personally, I haven't read something this well written and moving in one heck of a long time. I think you need to give it to the world as a memoir, as a book, before you try to whittle it down to so little of its essence it can actually fit into a few acts on stage. This is a woman's story, there are very few stories like this in the world and they so desperately need to be told. If it needs to be a play and you are committed to it at this point, I would take a very small aspect of this story that can be shown visually on stage and concentrate on telling it through actions and dialogue. But, as I've said, I think the play would be immensely more powerful with the memoir behind it. I also see it, absolutely, as a limited series. There is so much here that needs to be developed I just don't see how it can happen in one evening. And I'm using the stage 32 Android app to post this. I'm also speaking to my tablet and it is sort of interpreting the sound of my voice, sometimes I think it will be quicker to train a parrot. Please pardon any weird mistakes.
1 person likes this
Where can I read this?
2 people like this
Robert Russo , Ronika hasn't released her memoir, as a favour she is letting me read it. You can find out more about it on her site The Unfinished Heart
3 people like this
Just the overview sounds very compelling. You must have an incredibly strong spirit. I would invite you to listen to my podcast which is linked on my bio. It has a lot of information about healing from trauma.
1 person likes this
In my case, most of personal stuff leads to writer's block. I deal with it in two ways. One, I imagine a fiction character that had the same experience, and write about they. Second, I use automatic writing (just seat down, get a intro like "I was looking trhough the window..." And start writing what ever came to your mind during 5 minutes non-stop (even if you write things like, I am lost and dont know what to write). It works for me.
3 people like this
Hi Ronika Merl - how's your play coming along?