Screenwriting : DO or DIE ( my current project) COMMENT PLEASEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by Terrance Heiligh

Terrance Heiligh

DO or DIE ( my current project) COMMENT PLEASEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The story of a family that has too many ways to live. By there being only three pople left in this family, they're doing everything they can to stay alive. First they have to rescue their loved one , second take our the enemy, and lastly, stay under the radar. This is all easier said than done, but this is all DO or DIE.

Michael A. Wright

Sorry if this is harsh but, 1) you need to shorten this to two sentences, three tops 2) Contract the idea down to its essence and be succinct 3) clean up the spelling and grammar 4) Your last sentence uses "this is all" twice. Redundant. Hope this helps.

Michael A. Wright

Great log line, Lyse. I'm stealing it;)

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