Screenwriting : Screenwriter needed - TITLE: Death to America by Peter D. Slama

You might want to work on the title. PM me the logline, if you want to share.

I think you should change the title too....

How about : THE DAY AMERICA DIED?

Jacqueline that is a great title....

I think we'd all like to know.

All good stories/ideas are worth developing. If you want to send me the details I'll gladly give you my professional opinion.

I'll write if for you.

Want an honest objective opinion, ask me.

Think we just got "Slama'd" LOL!

The title alone got my attention...

Concept is king... and remember the goal - entertain.

Holy Crap - I must apologize twice - First; I have been away from my technology for a couple days and did not realize what I was missing - Second, I did not think the title was that impressive that it would garner this level of controversy or opinionated attention. I suppose I would be open to a new title upon getting an actual script written, it was merely a suggestion base on its perfect summarization of the story line.

I can also assure that the title is not meant to gain me notoriety (especially since I am surprised by the reaction), the idea/story is unmeasurably more frightening than the title alone. Which to respond to the comment about my being told not to pursue this movie making idea, being about marketability, that is not the fear. It is a crazy idea for a movie about a terrorist plot that could be very real, easily executed by someone with little resources and not extremely intelligent, so the movie idea could serve as a game plan for any idiot. That is why I have been told it is a bad idea. Not that that has stopped any of the Hollywood yo-yos before. Think of Sum of All Fears, Peacemaker, 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow all rolled together into a movie about a man who seeks to incite terror, pain and destruction for the same reason as Christopher Nolan's Joker.

I am now further conflicted about pursuing this idea/plot due to the emotions the title alone has seemed to stir up. To all of you who messaged me about writing for/with me, I will be in touch soon. Thank you all for the input!

So.... What's it about?

Its about a terrorist plot against the United States, as explained previously. As for the finite details of the storyline, maybe I am a little paranoid, but I think that would be only shared with a potential writer not everyone. I am new to this side of the industry, but shouldn't I be nervous about people taking my idea? Does anyone have advice about vetting the potential writers?

I also meant to clarify that the title is a bit of a play on words as is commonly used, but it does speak to the message and/or story

No need for apologies peter.... I have a storyline in the same vein... and felt the same way as you do about it... You are fortunate to have others offer to write with you... I tried to no avail.... I too, think my storyline would make for a heart stopping watch...

You cannot protect an idea, only your interpretation of it. There are a million great ideas, but it's the execution that counts. Sadly, 99.9999% of ideas are not executed well. I pitch my ideas to people all the time to validate them. I work off the theory that if you can execute it before me, be my guest. But as a screenwriter i know that a pitch is not character, dialogue, pacing or structure. PM those interested. You can never have success by keeping thing to yourself and the idea might not even work.

D. Marcus... would you like to write mine too?

What about the title "America will Fall" does that sound more palatable?

D Marcus - would like to expand the conversation regarding your willingness to write for me, please advise next steps - Thank you!

Everyone's focusing on the title, but honestly the working title doesn't really matter. I wouldn't put too much stake in it, if you try to sell it in Hollywood honestly the marketing machine will change it/tweak it/twerk it into what they want it to be, and if you go the indie route, it will depend on your financiers/distributor. You might even realize halfway through the script that there's a better title for it. Personally I like the subject matter, and I'd love to take look at the logline, and speak with you further about it.

Thank you for the comments Sloane! As I stated earlier, I don't think the title should garner this much attention. As I also stated earlier, I am new to this whole end of the industry and a couple of you have asked for a logline, which I am now understanding to be a summary of the story. What would be the best method for getting this to persons interested (my summary/logline is a few pages long)?

Ok, now I am being told that a logline is more like a tagline, one or two sentences - is this true?

It is funny, as I now wonder about the importance of a title and question whether my other conceptual project titles would be problematic - "Deadbeat" - "Killing Hollywood" & "Hating God"

A logline is the elevator pitch. It's the "sizzle, not the steak" of your story...examples: A billionaire creates a living theme park from the fossilized DNA of dinosaurs, but things go awry when the dinosaurs escape and his grandchildren go missing. A hacker discovers the world he lives in is not real, and he is the key to the survival of the human race. The title is not set in stone, but can be a selling point "Snakes on a plane" tells you exactly what its about, whereas "The Matrix" is more ambiguous. Again, your title/concept may sound great, but without the execution of a great script, it won't go anywhere. Sounds like your titles come from a dark place... Would you like to talk about it? LOL!

lol yeah, if you want to sell those movies, you're alienating more than 50% of the American audience by calling it "Hating God". People love God, they love guns, and they love America. Unless you're shopping these script in North Korea, in which case your script titles are not a bad idea! Also, I doubt many execs would be gung-ho about "Killing Hollywood" considering it's their life. I like the ambition and fight against the establishment, but this industry is funny in that you tend to need to be established before you can expect to fight the establishment.

Deadbeat .... yes... hating God no... no, no....

I keep reading these post about the names of the titles I have suggested and the suggested tenderness of the movie going population, and it is almost seems as though I am the only person on this site who is living in the country where Grand Theft Auto and MW3 are the top selling video games. - not mention the top shows on television (including HBO, Showtime and Starz)

Unfortunately, the majority of the movie-going public are not in NYC or LA, which have the highest concentration of "HBO/Starz" audiences, they are in the other 48 states and most for them are very conservative. Thus, a title like "Death to America", would never even make it out of the pitch meeting (unless it was a terrorist parody movie)... Wait a minute...

Marvin... you are pretty quick on the uptake.... lol

I may be wrong but from the title and the brief descriptions you've given, the story seems to be pointing towards "A beginner's guide on how to terrorise America and get away with it", in which case, I'd really advise against it. If it's true that life imitates art, then you want to be careful what you put out there. The trick is to know where to draw the line between unadulterated art and recklessness. Like I said, maybe I'm being naive or just completely misunderstand you.

Marvin I am really enjoying your posts/comments, but once again I would reference current topics - Like the fact that Killing Jesus is one of the top selling books this year and Killing Lincoln (arguably the most celebrated Presidents in History especially by Patriotic types) was one of last years top sellers.

Owen, you are not all wrong in your assessment of the movie concept, except for the getting away with it part. I have heard novelist in the past suggest that their books have prompted the government to accept their storyline as a feasible attack plot and then prepare for the realistic probability of it. My story is the same, it is a realistic plot that could be carried out by someone if they were to think of it, which is why it would make a good movie plot, but in the movie the actions would be taken to prevent/stop it. As I expressed in previous posts, I do realize the potential irresponsibility of making a movie that has realistic implications, however it is a really inventive plot that portrays my creativity. I have been terrified by movies (not horror) that I felt could be imitated in real life and have often wondered if that premise should keep a person from moving forward with something they feel passionate about.

Marvin, a few of the connections I have made here at Stage 32 have offered me an opportunity to view their profiles online, as to review their accomplishments, accreditations, credentials, and recommendations/endorsements from friends and colleagues. Due to your impressive knowledge and helpful comments, I was wondering if you would have something of the same? I would very much like to know more about your history and experience in the industry.

PM me, Peter and ask away.

@Peter - You referring to the books by Bill 'Right wing" O'Reilly? All I'm saying is the title does not have to define your film, If its about a Terror attack, maybe find something within the subject matter. Think "The sum of all our fears" or 'Patriot games", examples of very smart titles.

Craig James - Thank you for the link Marvin Willson - Great tip, thank you for the informative comments!

Thank you Marvin....

Thanks Craig for the suggestion....ISA... when looking for a co-writer.

Does have any advice for narrowing down the list of interested and potential writers - I have lots of inquiries/interest and now I am not sure how to best vet them - There are many of them that seem qualified, as well being interesting and exciting prospects that would seem fun to work with?

It's not easy, is it? Nice to have so many interested writers that you have to make this difficult decision. To narrow down the list; assuming that your list now includes only writers who are willing to work under your specific needs and meet your specific qualifications you need to read their work. Start with samples; say 10 to 20 pages. Choose a few that you really like and read two or three of their completed screenplays. It's gut feeling that you will follow. There is no special criteria that will determine the writer that you feel the most connected to. To be fair to the writers make sure you tell then exactly what you expect from them; things like deadlines (who sets them), who has final say in creative disputes (very important), if it's a work for hire or a percentage deal (this is important for copyright ownership) and what happens if they do not fulfill their end of the agreement, i.e. they decide they no longer can or want to continue. And get everything in writing.

An interesting thread Jacqueline, thanks. Have to agree with you on this one. If a screenwriter was any good he/she would be writing their own projects and getting paid or sold. Many people who post and want to collaborate on S32 really don't have the writing abilities to cut it and need the support of a collaborator though they really should be writing and learning from a mentor. Peter, hope all turns out well for you though take the journey, join a few screenwriting forums like "Writer Arena" and learn the art. It will benefit you in the long run. Good luck.

"advice for narrowing down the list of interested and potential writers " Peter, go for someone who doesn't offer to do it so easily. I am working on 3 features at the moment, 2 others in development, a TV Sitcom (first season)and a pile of shorts and comps. Any talented writers should be the same... If they have the time to write your story then question WHY ????

I can answer your "WHY????", Alex. Not all talented writers "should" be doing exactly what you are doing. Each writer has their own method. I always have many ideas brewing and I jot down notes and even write out scenes as they pop into my head, but I do not have several features working with others in development and several shorts and a TV series like you do. We are very different writers - both talented. I would have the time for this kind of collaboration. My method of writing allows for it. I can take the time from my writing assignments and my personal projects to work on a script in collaboration with someone like Peter. I suspect there are other talented writers who manage their time differently than you do and would be willing to collaborate.