THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES

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DAMNTRAK

DAMNTRAK
By Paul Glen Neuman

GENRE: Comedy, Fantasy
LOGLINE:

Recently deceased Eddie Agro takes a ride on the ultimate soul train when a clerical error in the underworld's Accounting Department mistakenly sends him to hell.

SYNOPSIS:

Eddie Agro is having a really bad day. He's just been murdered by his greedy business partner and, instead of going to Heaven, a clerical error in the Underworld's Accounting Department lands Eddie in an assigned seat on Damntrak, the train responsible for transporting condemned passengers to Hell.

Upon his arrival at Hell's Grander Central Station, Eddie's frantic protests that he's really not supposed to be there fall upon deaf ears. Instead, Eddie is threated by a brutish gatekeeper named Mike to not cause problems or else.

Figuring he's already in Hell, how much worse can things be, Eddie ignores Mike's warning and, in the confrontation that follows, Mike inadvertently causes his own demise.

Naturally, Eddie gets blamed for Mike's accident and, with Mike's friends converging on him to inflict some serious bodily harm, Eddie storms through the Gates of Hell to escape.

Ten minutes later, finds Eddie captured and brought before a judge and jury where all the jurors are kangaroos.

Within minutes, Eddie is convicted and sentenced to an eternity of suffering, when an unexpected reprieve, due to the Powers That Be acknowledging that he was never really supposed to be sent to Hell, temporarily saves Eddie from eternal damnation.

Instead, Eddie is assigned to the custodial care of Frances Misker, a beautiful young woman in Hell since 1911 for being the first person with a New York Public Library card to have an overdue book.

Under Frances' guidance, Eddie learns what it takes to survive in Hell, in spite of a thug like Mack Stickler gunning for Eddie's hide. Mack, it turns out, is the big brother of the brute Eddie helped eliminate when he first stepped off Damntrak.

Joined at the hip in more ways than one, Frances introduces Eddie to many of Hell's celebrities, including Mussolini, Al Jolson and Hitler. Eddie's also reunited with his estranged father, who happens to be one of Frances' ex-husbands.

Ultimately, Eddie's unplanned presence in Hell creates anomalies, such as rainbows, that ripple throughout the Underworld, creating all sorts of problems that lead to a decision by those in charge to eliminate Eddie altogether.

With his life on the line, Eddie knows it will take a miracle to save him before it's too late.

Nate Rymer

Rated this logline

B A Mason

Not going to lie - this idea is very derivative. It's been done to death.

Tasha Lewis

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Nathaniel Baker

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Jim Boston

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