David, nice little story, but the execution not quite right - your page 9 is wrong, you destroyed any dramatic tension with an easy solution, Gladys should not have come in guns blazing until the absolute last moment, the Stranger should have been in absolute dire straights, but he got off lightly, this is poor writing - then explaining the scenario by letter re Gladys and the brother, very average, David, you can do better than that - you're on the right track, but you haven't nailed this, yet, cheers.
David, nice little story, but the execution not quite right - your page 9 is wrong, you destroyed any dramatic tension with an easy solution, Gladys should not have come in guns blazing until the absolute last moment, the Stranger should have been in absolute dire straights, but he got off lightly, this is poor writing - then explaining the scenario by letter re Gladys and the brother, very average, David, you can do better than that - you're on the right track, but you haven't nailed this, yet, cheers.