Two losers. A truck of breakfast items. A cross-dressed mob informant.  Two hitmen. A little person, tall person tossing, drug dealer. A large bag of Mary Jane. A frozen dog. A silent ventriloquist doll.  A cucumber. WTF?

SYNOPSIS:

Jason and Torrance are, well; two losers hoping to make it big. Jason hopes to be a musician but can only play one song, and Torrance wants to be a ventriloquist but his dummy gets stage fright. They are drivers for the number one rated home delivery service; Mr. Breakfast. They are tasked to house sit for the CEO, Colonel Bradshaw because it is believed they fear him so much; they will not let anything happen to his mansion of his wife's dog Fi-Fi. Their co-workers trick them into holding a huge party at the mansion and a series of events leads to the damage of the CEO's Hummer. A friend of this states he can fix it; however, he'll need six thousand dollars to complete the project. Deserted by everyone except their friend Adrian, the trio comes up with a way to quickly earn the money. They'll take a Mr. Breakfast truck full of products across the country and sell raffle tickets, and once they arrive at the studio of the top-rated radio show; they'll blackmail them to announce the winner. The trio does not realize the logistical mistakes they are making; however, Fi-Fi the dog does. Before taking off, Mr. Bradshaw's neighbor, Carlos, tricks the duo into carrying drugs to one of his customers in another state. Departing the first time, the duo run over Fi-Fi, and in the hope of finding a 'cure', they place her in one of the freezers. They take off, not knowing that there is a tracking device in the bag of drugs and that three federal agents are following them. The duo decides to make a stop in Las Vegas, where Torrance is set upon wheelchair riding elderly and Jason spends the night with the female agent following them. As they depart Las Vegas, they pick up a young lady named Dottie and her dog. Dottie is Dalton dressed as a woman running from two mafias hitmen who never miss. Howie and Johnny are tasked by Don Tomlin to kill Dalton because he has promised to spill secrets. Johnny and Howie have been together for 29 hits, and Johnny has fallen in love with his partner and hopes to tell him as they chase Dalton down. They miss Dalton in Vegas but learn that he is traveling aboard a Mr. Breakfast truck. The trio works their way across the country selling tickets and participates in a few adventures to include; selling the bag of marijuana to a senior citizen group having breakfast. Law enforcement agencies and the three federal agents raid the breakfast believing it's a major drug den and is embarrassed about the truth. The three federal agents continue tailing the Mr. Breakfast truck. The trio arrives at Chase's house, who they were informed had 'dirt' on the radio hosts that would enable them to blackmail them into announcing the winners of the raffle to America. At Chase's house, they meet Mary and her daughter Megan. Megan is four years old and will die soon if she does not receive a kidney. The only viable donor is her deadbeat father, who is not around. Discovering the only thing Chase has is pirated copies of the radio stars CDs, he goes into a moment of hatred for the world around him, until he looks into the face of a young lady who may not live to see five years. Jason decides that they will break into the radio station, hold the crew hostages and have them make announcements in search of the father. They seek the assistance of Jason's uncle to break into the station. Uncle Wayne takes the easy way in and gets tickets for the whole group. The hitmen also enter the studio and the three federal agents wait outside to try and learn what is going on. Declaring their intention to blow up the studio if the radio team does not broadcast a call for Megan's father to come forward; it's a standoff with the hitmen seeing it as an opportunity to make a clean hit, and for the federal agents: a chance to redeem themselves. As the world waits, the radio hosts learn about Jason and Torrance’s shattered dreams, Johnny’s love for his partner, Dalton’s problem with the mob, and the frozen dead dog sitting in their break room freezer. The FBI arrives and learns that the three federal agents who have been following Jason and Torrance are with the I.P.C; the branch of the cable companies that investigates piracy of cable. They are soon sent on their way.

The radio hosts solve everyone's issues; Jason and Torrance overcome their creative blocks, Dalton no longer has to run from the mob, the hitmen plan to retire and spend their lives together, and it's discovered once she is thawed out, that Fi-Fi was only stunned. Megan's father arrives and has numerous demands he wants to be met before giving up a lifesaving kidney, so Mary and Megan send him packing. The hitmen decide to do one more hit, for free and run over Megan's father as he leaves. It's discovered that he is an organ donor, so the little girl will receive two kidneys. The duo surrenders and have to spend some time in prison, but once they are released they join the concert shows of the Sam and Tyler Show.