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By Sophie Von Rheden
When the Berlin Wall falls in 1989, the troubled student seeks a painting and instead meets an East German officer whose surprising identity she discovers years later.
SYNOPSIS:
The blood-young countess is literally the spitting image of her ancestor, which causes enormous confusion in an attractive young man from East Germany, who therefore falls in love with her.
Neither does she know that he is in possession of the old painting of her great-great-grand-aunt, nor does he know that she is the great-great-granddaughter he is looking for in West Germany to return the painting of her family..
After the one-night stand, they both miss each other in the tumult of the reopening of the Brandenburg Gate for the next thirty years.
However, one day she runs into an elegant sponsor on the picturesque holiday island of Mallorca and does not suspect, given to his English title and new ID, that he is the East German comrade from whom she was once left pregnant. He either doesn't suspect, that he sponsors his own son, a polo playing celebrity.
The family get's finally together and also the masterpiece of art comes back.
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Hi, Sophie Von Rheden. Here’s a logline template that might help:
“After ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion), a _______ (the protagonist with an adjective) tries to _______ (goal of story) so ________ (stakes).”
Loglines are one or two sentences (a one-sentence logline sounds better and it takes less time for a producer, director, etc. to read it). You can add the antagonist in the logline. The inciting incident can also be at the end of the logline.
Avoid using “must” in loglines because “must” sounds like the main character is forced to do whatever the goal of the story is (instead of the main character doing it willingly), and “must” doesn’t sound active. Audrey Knox (a TV literary manager) also said this during a logline review webinar on Stage 32 (https://www.stage32.com/webinars/The-Write-Now-Challenge-The-Logline-Rev...). Instead of using “must,” use “attempts to,” “fights to,” “struggles to,” “strives to,” “sets out to,” “fights,” “battles,” “engages in,” “participates,” “competes,” etc.
Example #1:
“After a group of dog criminals arrives in a small town, an impulsive dog sheriff defends a dog treat factory so they won’t steal food that’s meant for hungry dog families.”
Example #2:
“A dysfunctional couple works together to survive against bears after they crash on an abandoned road miles from help.”
NOTE: Not all stories will follow this logline template. Biopics and documentaries might not follow this template. The overall logline for a TV show might not follow this template, but the logline for an episode in the show could.
Hope this helps. :)
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Maurice Vaughan Hi Maurice, Is this Logline closer to what you mean? Have a nice weekend all-around.
Hi, Sophie. I like your logline, but I think you should explain how the comrade turns her life brutally upside down, and I think the logline needs the stakes (what happens if she doesn't find the valuable painting).
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