Definitely the potential for something hilarious here, but it's not being captured in the logline. What makes the conflict funny? That has to be described.

You put an idea instead of a logline, Wayne Cothron.

For a logline, you want something like: "After ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion), a _______ (the protagonist with an adjective) tries/attempts to _______ (goal of story) so ________ (stakes)."

The inciting incident can also be at the end of the logline.

Excellently said Maurice Vaughan . I would also add that conflict can also be captured in a logline by saying "but when ______________(twist/conflict) happens, ______________(story goal) is put in doubt." In other words, summarize first and beginning of second act in about 50-70 words.

No "raisins". The logline is dry and does not moisturize the reader's thoughts. For example, the movie "Alien" 1979

A team of space truckers receives a signal from an unknown planet, according to the protocol, it is necessary to investigate the source of the signal, but during the study of the signal, one of the crew members becomes infected by an unknown life form. Infection of a crew member is only the beginning of the development of an alien organism. There must be material that develops into something big. Please forgive me for the harsh criticism.

I apricate Val Chernyavskiy s criticism and there are no hard feelings, but this project was meant to be a ten-minute comedy sketch, not a television show or film.

The only reason I posted this on Stage 32 I just wanted to see if it was funny to other people not just me.

And I can't stress this enough that there are no hard feelings in fact. I'm sorry Val didn't like the sketch.

I wish everyone who takes the time to read any of my work a good and successful career and a good weekend.

Great idea! Good luck in actuality though. A Dem. Governor in Florida. I wish!!!!

Is Al Gore too old to run????