Post your loglines. Get and give feedback.
A divorced comedian falls for her new friend who admires her and supports her, until she puts him in her material.
SYNOPSIS:
Pete seeks out new guests for his divorce podcast and finds Marie, a fiery divorced comic using her self expression to heal through humor. After he interviews her they stay in touch and become friends. Living 3000 miles apart, they stay in touch and develop a friendship. Each day they talk for hours and enjoy each other's virtual company. The chemistry between them grows but their long distance keeps Pete hesitant to act on anything. Marie heads to LA for a comedy tour and they finally meet. Their chemistry becomes consummated and it becomes a week long romance. Marie leaves LA on cloud 9, feeling like she has found "the one". When she gets back to New York she asks him why they are not pursuing this as a real relationship. Pete becomes defensive and cold telling her "I'll never be your boyfriend". Out of frustration and disappointment Marie puts him in her material. Pete notices the material on a link in her social media and when he sees it, makes a decision that may end any hopes of their future as friends or more.
Rated this logline
1 person likes this
This logline did enough to make me interested in the idea, but the synopsis suggests the relationship was never put in jeopardy by the material on stage; the guy only wanted friendship all along. The stakes would be higher if the material jeopardizes the relationship, much as Mrs. Maisel's performances jeopardize her relationship with her husband in Season 1 of that show. And then I would want to know what she wants more, love or success? A lot to like here, though.
1 person likes this
Awesome feedback Stephan, its a new work and I literally was playing around with the synopsis, so this feedback helps TREMENDOUSLY! More to come!
Rated this logline
Also does anyone know how to edit the synopsis ? I don't see an edit button.
Hey, Michele! If you click on the little dropdown carrot towards the top of the post, you should be able to go in and edit it :)
Really really fun start, by the way!
Thank you Angela!!! I revised =)
Stephan take a look at the revised one , let me know your thoughts. =D
Rated this logline
Awesome thanks guys for the feedback on the logline I will be posting the first draft this week if you are interested in reading!
Rated this logline
Rated this logline