Johnny is having a gathering, first only who he invited comes, later on more and more people begin to come and go. Later on it turns out the Johnny threw this gathering because he suspects his friend's friend is a wanted mole man and he knew he'll invite the him. And this was their chance to arrest him.
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Scene 1:JOHNNY just finished preparing his home for the party the bell is ringing
Johnny (Shouts): In a sec.
He goes and looks through the peephole and sees MARK he opens the door, and they give each other a high five and bros hug.
Johnny: How are you doing man?
Mark: What's up dude?
They sit.
Johnny: I'm doing good, you?
Mark: You know how I'm doing man, same shit different day. Is TYLER here?
Johnny: Not yet, why you miss him?
Mark: No.
Johnny: That's kinda gay of you, I'll tel him how you miss him so badly.
Mark: Shut the fuck up man.
Johnny: Still at the old shitty job?
Mark: Yeah, I hate this hole, I'm telling you I'm gonna quit next week.
Johnny: it's always next week, next day next whatever, you are a man of words not actions.
Mark: Believe me, I'm gonna quit. I can't take anymore trash. I've had enough of that. Literally.
Johnny: Damn, that's literally. I get lazy throwing my own trash. Wanna go outside it's cozy.
Mark: After you, my lady.
Johnny (Impression of mark): No, no no no, after you. My lady.
They both stand and wait for the other to go.
Mark: Sooooo.....
Together: Sooooo....
There's a knock on the door.
Johnny (screams): Just a sec Tyler.
He goes to open. Unseeable meanwhile Mark takes popcorn from the table.
Mark: You are the lady.
Johnny (opens the door): Oh, fuck off.
Tyler (thinks Johnny said it to him): Who the fuck you fucking off? You should thank me for arriving you little fucker.
Johnny: No I meant to Mark.
Tyler: Fuck you and your bullshit. I'm outta this crappy scrappy dump hole.
He begins to walk away.
Mark goes to Tyler.
Mark: He meant to me Tyler, don't be a pusy.
Tyler comes back.
Tyler: A what you called me?
Mark: P-u-s-s-y. A pussy.
Tyler: Wanna fight? I'll fucking knock yo head off yo long ass neck.
Mark: I already won fighting you, remember.
A flash back of their fight.
Tyler: That night I was really a pussy. But now I'm a grown ass man. Imma beat you.
Johnny: Why won't we all calm down, the night just started. You'll have all night to fight.
Tyler: Pretty Johnny is right, we have all night. We'll fight later.
Mark: You scared.
Tyler: No I ain't, we'll fight later.
Tyler walks inside the house.
Tyler: What's yo deal with all those carpets?
Johnny: They look good, what'd you mean?
Mark (puts his hand on Johnny's shoulder): They are terrible.
Johnny: I like them and that's what matters.
Tyler: Hell no that's not what matters, they really look horrible. We should've done it with my home.
Mark: He does have a point. And where the party at? I see only two celebrators.
Johnny: I didn't know who else to invite. We are like the Holly triangle.
Tyler: I'll make some calls.
He goes to the side and gets his phone
Tyler (to himself): A party of three, dumb ass.
As Mark and Johnny talk to each other Tyler speaks in the backround with people and he is heard in the backround.
Mark: A party of three Johnny? Three? If you are having a party number one rule is to have at least 1 bitch for every 3 to 5 celebrators.
Johnny: Is it even a word? "Celebrators"?
Mark: You are focusing on the wrong part of the sentence. And I said a smart ass sentence, and you know that doesn't happen often.
Johnny: That's right that doesn't happen often. But that wasn't a smart sentence.
Mark: That was a smart sentence.
Johnny: No it wasn't.
Mark: You are right, it wasn't. It was a smart ass sentence.
Johnny: You have any guests you wanna invite too?
Mark: I can invite some bitches.
Johnny: No pimp shit.
Mark: Then I can't do such thing sir.
Johnny: Don't sir me.
Mark: I'll sir who I want whenever I want. Sir.
Johnny: Fuck you.
Mark: I always beat you in these little mind games.
Johnny looks like he had enough.
Johnny: Wanna go outside now?
Mark: After you.
Johnny (interrupts): Yes, yes after me.
They go ouside and Tyler goes to them.
Tyler: I invited some homies, it's about to get going tonight amigos.
Johnny: What, how much you invited? You talked for about an hour on the phone.
Tyler: Don't worry pal, I invited just enough.
Mark: Tyler is trustable. For example if he'd say "LeBron is retiring" I'll be like "shit word?"
Tyler dubs him up.
Tyler: Fuck yeah man.
Mark: Pause. Is he retiring?
Tyler: No. I meant fuck yeah I'm trustable.
Johnny: Would you trust him if he'd say, for example "I'll beat you in a fight"?
Mark: No, but because I'm more trustable than him and I'd say it won't happen, not now and not ever.
Tyler: I'll beat you. You'll see that later.
Mark: I'm patience, a patience killer.
Tyler: I ain't scared of killers. I done have killed killers so that makes me the killers killer.
There's knocking on the door.
All them 3: Just a second/sec.
Johnny (gets up): I'll get it.
Tyler: I'll get it, you did that for 3 times tonight, and these are my guests.
Johnny: They are more of my guests cause this is my home.
Mark: It's Tyler's invitors, and Johnny's guests.
They knock angrly. Tyler goes to open for them.
Johnny: Invitors? Is that even a word?
Tyler (in the backround): Sup, sup sup? Come outside, we outside.
Mark: It's my word.
Tyler and his friends go outside.
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Hi, Oded Nave. This is a nice start. I think the scene needs some work. Here’s my feedback/suggestions:
“Later on it turns out the Johnny threw this gathering because he suspects his friend's friend is a wanted mole man and he knew he'll invite the him. And this was their chance to arrest him.” Maybe start the scene with Johnny doing something to show he suspects his friend’s friend is a wanted mole, like him going over a folder of info he’s been putting together on the mole. That way, the audience will know what Johnny’s plan is (dramatic irony), and the scene will be suspenseful.
I suggest describing your characters' personalities when you first introduce them in the script. And their appearances and clothes/accessories if those things are important to the story. You don't have to take a lot of space describing their personalities, appearances, and clothes/accessories.
“Johnny (Shouts): In a sec.” You could also write that as “Johnny: In a sec!” Same thing for “Johnny (screams): Just a sec Tyler.”
“He goes and looks through the peephole and sees MARK he opens the door.” You could shorten that to “He checks the peephole and sees MARK he opens the door.”
I think you could do more with “They sit.” Maybe reveal something about Johnny or Mark’s character. Something like “Mark does a little dance around the room, checking out things” (to show he’s nosy), then “They sit.” Or “They sit. Mark puts his feet up on the center table. Johnny knocks them off the table and brushes it off” (to show Johnny likes things clean).
“Mark: You know how I'm doing man, same shit different day. Is TYLER here?” You only need to put a character’s name in all caps in action lines when you first introduce him in the script, not dialogue.
Johnny says, “Johnny: it's always next week, next day next whatever, you are a man of words not actions.” I think “you are a man of words not actions.” is too on the nose. Maybe write something like “Johnny: it's always next week, next day next whatever. Fucking do it already and stop talking about it.”
“He goes to open. Unseeable meanwhile Mark takes popcorn from the table.” Take out “Unseeable.” If the audience can’t see Mark taking the popcorn, how will we know he’s doing it?
“He begins to walk away. *” Tyler is angry, so maybe change that to “He storms off.”
I don’t think the conversation about the smart sentence adds anything to the story. Maybe replace it with some other dialogue.
“They go ouside and Tyler goes to them.” They change locations, so add a new scene heading.
“There's knocking on the door*.” Did they go back into the house? If so, I suggest adding a new scene heading.