Screenwriting : Question about writing a Pilot by Jonathan Eric Peterson

There's a saying I hear often, writing is rewriting. Rewrite the pilot from scratch. You'll be able to do it because you know the story already. You'll be able to tell that story with those other characters stories in mind and more defined now and it'll reflect in the writing. It will also be better that way versus you trying to fit more things into a script that never had those things in mind. You don't need a two hour pilot. To me that's a harder sell (if that's even sell-able, I don't know enough to say) and less is more. That's my take. Hope this helps.

Very helpful, yes. Thank you. You have confirmed what I expected.

Jonathan Eric Peterson Glad I could help.

Hey Jonathan Eric Peterson Great question! May I ask - what other shows are you using as comparisons? Have you broken down the pilot episodes of those shows to see who they set up and how fast? For example, if you break down Grey's Anatomy (Shonda Rhymes) and The West Wing (Aaron Sorkin), you'll find at least a half a dozen characters with relationships set up within a 45min window. Just an idea for how to approach your next rewrite ;-)

Nick Assunto - Stage32 Script Services Thank you for that feedback. Much appreciated.

Karen "Kay" Ross great examples. Thank you. I'll read those over.

Shop talk... luv u guys:) great stuff

Two hour pilot isn't the answer, rewriting is.

Whenever I go home to see my Mom, we usually sit in the living room and watch cop shows together - she loves them. They all have supporting characters, and every episode features some B or C or runner with them. Sometimes it's very little screen time, but a very important piece of the puzzle - so that character gets a little moment to shine in an episode that they are hardly in.

Pat Duncan who wrote COURAGE UNDER FIRE and MR HOLLAND'S OPUS has this theory that the less time a character is on screen the more "concentrated" their character needs to be. This explains that quirky computer nerd character in all of those shows that my Mom watches.

So pretend that you have made it onto staff on some show, and the notes on your pilot are from the showrunner, and you need to boost those supporting characters in this episode without changing the running time. It's still a one hour show. Do the rewrite - condensing and trimming some things a little to make room for those supporting character scenes. Find ways to highlight them. Those quirky computer nerds on my Mom's cop shows are fan favorites. Give them enough personality to make up for their limited screen time.

When I do rewrites on features I always try to add material without adding pages. It's possible. Good luck.

William Martell thank you for the response. Much appreciated.

Hi Jonathan, happy to read your pilot if you still need feedback.

Per your question, yes, this that is a bad idea. Even a very well-established writer would have a difficult time selling a pitch for a two-hour pilot.

Joshua Keller Katz Thank you. I appreciate the feedback

I think a two hour pilot is not the answer. Personally I only make changes to a screenplay if I believe the changes would improve my screenplay. So make sure you agree with that person who offered feedback.

Just to add to my previous comment - Consider reading things that DIDN'T work as well. I love Firefly, but a 90-minute pilot for a series that would normally be 45-minutes is a hard sell, even for someone as brilliant as Joss Whedon. If you go back and watch it again, it's slow. The kind of slow that would lose a good number of people because they expect their TV shows to move.