Screenwriting : What details to include in scene descriptions by Göran Johansson

Göran Johansson

What details to include in scene descriptions

Obviously, one should include all relevant details when one describes a scene. But what details are assumed to be so obvious that one may not mention them.

Should one mention that a cemetery has a parking lot? Should one write that somebody is in the parking lot when they get out of their car?

Should one mention that the wall in a corridor has doors?

Should one write that an office is normally furnished?

Since I have recently asked many formating questions. I hope this is my last question.

Why I ask so trivial questions? Due to my creation of no-budget films, I know how important it is to double check everything.

Maurice Vaughan

Hey, Göran Johansson. Feel free to ask as many formatting questions as you want.

Just ask yourself when you're about to write an action line, "Is the door, window, etc. important enough to mention?"

Ronnie Mackintosh

Hi Goran, agree with Maurice, as for the cemetery parking lot, you most likely will have that set up already in the slugline - EXT. CEMETERY PARKING LOT - DAY, then when your character moves from the parking lot, the action takes place elsewhere, GRAVESIDE, CHURCH etc

Göran Johansson

Dear friends, thanks for your comments.

Yes, the details are important. I know how difficult it is to find locations which satisfy specific criteria. So I specify as few details as possible.

When it comes to sluglines. In my native country, allmost all cemetaries belong to the Swedish Lutheran Church, and have the parking lot immediately outside the cemetery itself. But USA is far more culturally diversified, and the production company probably chooses the nearest cemetery which can be used.

Any more comments?

Maurice Vaughan

You're welcome, Göran Johansson.

Mike Childress

With my current feature I have essentially culled most unnecessary descriptions/descriptive words. I am putting the "action" back in action lines. I think legitimately ask yourself about any detail, e.g. office furnishings "Does this matter to the scene/story?"

Matthew Kelcourse

Hi Göran Johansson - world building is important (ie: essential). The writer needs to paint a picture without becoming a word flatulenteur ;-) This, IMO, takes a few more descriptors writing sci-fi and fantasy, etc... (new worlds) and I agree with Maurice Vaughan (he's right 99.9% of the time;-) - if it's important to the story, work it in creatively.

Tony Ray

Only put in what ends up being relevant to the scene. For instance, I wrote a scene in a script recently where a hallway had about a dozen doors with keypad locks on them. It was important to mention it because the protagonist had to find someone and that someone was hiding behind one of those doors. Otherwise, it would've been negligible.

Furthermore, I would say that if someone in the setting should be mentioned but isn't important right now, put it bluntly. For example:

He walked into his new office, looking around at the brand-new furniture [NOTE: THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER]

Hope this was helpful.

Göran Johansson

Dear friends, many thanks for further comments.

Yes, I try to limit myself from writing those details which matter. At the same time the problem is that what is obvious for one person is not obvious for another person.

Wal Friman

What you do is you describe what happens.

Maurice Vaughan

"At the same time the problem is that what is obvious for one person is not obvious for another person." That's why I like to get feedback on my scripts, Göran Johansson. If someone says my action lines aren't clear, I'll go back and make them clearer.

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