THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES
Post your loglines. Get and give feedback.
RALPH GOES TO DOG SCHOOL
By Rich Wingerter
When an energetic border collie makes a very expensive mistake, his humans take him to a school of badly-behaved dogs so he can learn to fit into their suburban lives.
SYNOPSIS:
Farah and Kumar can't find two twenty-dollar bills. They blame each other until Farah learns that Ralph ate most of them, leaving only a corner.
Farah calls dog schools and gets Ralph enrolled in Bad Dog School.
Kumar takes Ralph to his first lesson, where Ralph excites the other five dogs and causes a tangle.
Miku, the trainer, quickly straightens them out and explains to Kumar that this is obedience training.
For humans.
(Each further episode features one of the other dogs and their problem.)
Based on a real dog who really ate $4,000.
See Coverfly (https://www.coverfly.com/) for the screenplay.
Image: Licensed from iStockPhoto.
Register / Log In
Rated this logline
Rated this logline
2 people like this
Unique idea, Rich Wingerter.
I think your logline needs more details, and names in loglines are usually for biopics, well-known stories, and franchises (like “Mission: Impossible”).
Here's a logline suggestion: "After his humans take him to dog school for making an expensive mistake, a ______ (the main flaw that the protagonist has to overcome in the script or an adjective that describes the protagonist’s personality) ______ (type of dog) meets other badly behaved dogs and __________ (story goal) to/so/in order to ________ (stakes)."
1 person likes this
Thanks for the advice, Maurice. I changed it to, "When an energetic border collie makes a very expensive mistake, his humans take him to a school of badly-behaved dogs, so he can learn to fit into their suburban lives." I hope that captures the spirit of the show.
1 person likes this
Thank you, Marcos and Tasha. Appreciate your ratings!
You're welcome, @Rich Wingerter. I like the logline! I don't think you need a comma after "dogs."
Rated this logline
Thank you, Maurice. I appreciate your advice.