Screenwriting

Here is my first go at doing a movie script format.

Chapter 6 Page 1

The Castle in the Sky

(Scene 1 - Wide shot EXT)

A wide, panoramic shot shows Garna, the giant, walking along a massive stone path leading toward the enchanted castle in the sky. The sky is tinged with deep blues and purples, giving the setting an otherworldly, dreamlike quality. The castle is still in the distance, towering over the landscape like a forgotten relic of ancient power. Garerit, hidden within the tree's branches, peers out carefully, his expression a mix of curiosity and apprehension. The tree sways slightly with Garna's movements, but the tailor holds on tight, making sure he isn't spotted.

As the castle loomed ahead, the tailor saw the world of giants stretch before him- massive, ancient, and perilous.

(Scene 2 - Wide shot EXT)

A glimpse into the inside of the enchanted castle's land reveals towering, massive stone structures that seem barely suitable for anyone smaller than a giant. Inside the gates, giants patrol the area—some standing guard, others relaxing near enormous stone tables, feasting and sharpening weapons. Their booming voices rise in laughter and conversation, giving the castle an alive yet threatening atmosphere. Several giants are loudly conversing as they guard and oversee their captives. The castle's magical aura intensifies here, and the stark contrast between the giants' immense size and the small figure of the tailor underscores the monumental challenge Garerit faces.

Within the castle, giants roam freely, their presence an ever-looming threat to those trapped here. Some are more dangerous than others.

(Scene 3 - Medium shot EXT)

The giants are scattered along the path, some sitting on large stone ledges, while others sharpen their weapons or haul massive supplies toward the castle. Their voices boom like rolling thunder, and their presence makes the tailor more cautious.

Garna - "Ah-ha! Borik! Still eating more than you fight, I see! Hah!"

Borik - "And you, Garna, still carrying twigs instead of real weight!"

(Scene 4 - Medium shot EXT)

A medium panel shows Garerit peeking from behind a tree branch, trying to stay unnoticed as the giants go about their business. His expression is focused, and there's a determined look in his eyes. The giants are mostly unaware of his presence, busy with their affairs. The tailor's observation of these giants introduces the danger they represent, but also hints at the potential strategy Garerit may employ to outwit them.

Garerit - Thought VO "More giants... I must avoid getting caught. Time to use my wits."

(Scene 5 - Close-Up shot EXT)

A close-up shot of Garerit shows him watching through the branches, his face partially hidden by pine needles. His eyes dart between the giants, trying to remain unseen. His grip tightens on the tree, and a single bead of sweat forms on his forehead as he realizes just how many giants are here.

Garerit - Thought VO "There are too many of them... I can't let them find me."

(Scene 6 - Wide shot EXT)

As Garna moves, the castle in the sky comes fully into view as it breaks through the clouds. The structure is colossal, with spiraling towers, ornate bridges of shimmering stone, and glowing runes carved into its walls. A mysterious blue-green light pulses from its windows, and spectral chains drape across sections of the castle, hinting at ancient magic and imprisoned souls. The clouds swirl around its base, adding to its eerie majesty. Garerit's eyes widen in awe and trepidation as he sees it up close for the first time. He grips the tree bark tighter, feeling the weight of his situation.

The enchanted castle stood before him, an eerie fortress of power and mystery. Whatever lay inside, it was not meant for the likes of men.

Ch6 Pg 2

(Scene 1 - Wide Shot EXT)

The castle doors loom before them, massive and adorned with arcane symbols. The air is thick with magic, swirling with glowing embers that drift like fireflies. Standing on the front steps is EliDoras, a tall, regal figure in flowing dark robes, his long silver hair cascading past his shoulders. His eyes glow unnaturally, and he holds a gilded staff, crackling with latent magic. Several other creatures, a fox with human-like eyes, a haggard old cow, and a massive hound with strange intelligence-stand nearby, watching. The fox, cow, and dog stand together, their features now more refined and humanoid. Their faces retain their animal characteristics, muzzles, ears, and fur-but their bodies are structured like those of humans, with proper limbs, posture, and clothing fitting their roles in the castle. The Fox: A slender figure with keen, intelligent eyes, dressed in a fine tunic and cloak, giving the impression of a cunning court official or a scholar. The Cow: A broad-shouldered individual with strong arms, wearing a simple yet practical outfit suited for physical labor, resembling a farmer or stable master. The Dog: Standing with a firm yet attentive posture, clad in a guard's uniform, exuding loyalty and duty, as if once a knight or castle guard before the curse.

(Scene 2 - Medium Shot EXT)

EliDoras smirks, looking down at Garerit, clearly amused by the tailor's small stature compared to Garna. Garna laughs heartily, unaware of the tension.

EliDoras (Cold and Calculating): "A tailor? In my domain? You must be more than you seem... or exceptionally foolish."

Garerit (Keeping His Cool, Responds Wryly): "They say the best tailors weave more than thread, my lord."

(Scene 3 - Close-Up EXT)

The fox, cow, and hound exchange glances, their eyes filled with silent desperation. Garerit notices their strange behavior, sensing something is wrong.

(Scene 4 - Medium Shot EXT)

EliDoras gestures toward the animals, a smirk playing on his lips. Garerit's expression hardens, gripping the strap of his satchel tightly. The fox takes a hesitant step forward, as if pleading.

EliDoras (Casual, Almost Bored): "They were once men and women, like yourself. A simple precaution. If my guests cannot run, they cannot leave."

Most rewrites fail for one simple reason:

Writers start downstream.

They jump into:

- scene fixes

- dialogue tweaks

- beat adjustments

- pacing corrections

- structural reshuffling

But if the spine is misaligned, none of those changes will hold.

A downstream rewrite can only stabilize a story that’s already defined upstream.

The upstream rewrite solves this.

The Upstream Rewrite Has Only Three Questions

1. What is the story for?

This is the purpose.

A story without a purpose can’t generate momentum.

2. What problem is the protagonist actually solving?

This is the function.

If the writer can’t articulate the protagonist’s functional problem,

the protagonist will feel passive no matter how many scenes you rewrite.

3. What is the spine that carries that solution from beginning to end?

This is the structure.

The spine is not the plot — it’s the through‑line of meaning that the plot expresses.

When the spine is clear, the story stops drifting.

Why This Works

Once the upstream layer is defined:

- scenes either support the spine or they don’t

- beats either carry the function or they don’t

- dialogue either expresses the purpose or it doesn’t

The rewrite becomes a process of alignment, not invention.

You’re no longer “fixing scenes.”

You’re realigning the story.

The downstream rewrite becomes obvious

When the spine is solid:

- unnecessary scenes fall away

- missing beats reveal themselves

- character choices sharpen

- pacing stabilizes

- the ending becomes inevitable

This is the power of the upstream rewrite.

It fixes the story at the level where the story actually lives.

Most story problems aren’t structural — they’re functional.

A screenplay collapses when the writer is trying to execute a story that hasn’t been defined at the functional level.

This creates a very specific kind of friction:

The writer is making downstream decisions based on an upstream definition that doesn’t exist yet.

You can feel this misalignment in the work long before you can articulate it.

Three Common Symptoms of Upstream Misalignment

1. Scenes feel disconnected

Not because the scenes are “bad,”

but because the spine isn’t defined.

Without a spine, scenes can’t attach to anything.

2. The protagonist feels passive

Not because they lack motivation,

but because their actual problem hasn’t been clarified.

If the writer doesn’t know what the protagonist is solving,

the protagonist can’t know either.

3. The story keeps drifting

Not because the writer is unfocused,

but because the purpose is fuzzy.

When the purpose is unclear, the story wanders.

The Core Misalignment

Writers often try to fix:

- pacing

- dialogue

- structure

- beats

- scenes

…without first defining:

- the story’s job

- the protagonist’s functional problem

- the spine that carries the solution

This is why downstream fixes don’t hold.

They’re being applied to a story that hasn’t been defined yet.

The Correction

Before touching a scene, ask:

“What function is this story performing — and for whom?”

When the function is clear,

the structure becomes inevitable

and the rewrite becomes far simpler.

PART 1 — “Upstream vs. Downstream Decisions: Why Writers Get Stuck in the Wrong Layer.”

Most writers think they’re stuck because a scene isn’t working.

But the real issue usually sits one layer above the scene.

There are only two layers in any creative project:

UPSTREAM (Definition Layer)

This is where you decide:

- what the story is

- what job it’s supposed to do

- what the spine is

- what the protagonist is actually solving

- what the audience is meant to experience

Upstream is identity, purpose, and function.

DOWNSTREAM (Execution Layer)

This is where you work on:

- scenes

- beats

- dialogue

- pacing

- structure

- polish

Downstream is craft and detail.

Where writers get stuck

Most writers try to fix downstream problems with downstream solutions.

But downstream problems almost always come from an upstream misalignment.

If the identity isn’t defined, the scenes won’t land.

If the function is unclear, the structure won’t hold.

If the purpose is fuzzy, the execution will drift.

The upstream reset

Here’s the question that stabilizes almost any project:

“What is this story for — and what job is it supposed to do?”

Answer that cleanly, and 80% of your downstream confusion disappears.

Having been double recommended a second time, my screenwriting year ended on a little high note.

It was an exhausting one, but I'm in the mood to wish everyone a happy new year and the strength to keep writing until you win that uphill battle.

I was double recommended for an animated fantasy adventure and a live-action sports and family drama.

And I do wonder if anyone, whose script has been included in the lookbook, has had any feedback, contacts or success from it. If you find the time, let me know.

Happy to have you in my network and wish you all the best

T.

Hello everyone - Happy New Year!!

I haven't been on here in around 2 weeks, but I have finished my Season 1 Static Screams Script that is ready to pitch within the new year. Fingers crossed.

How has everyone else been doing? :)

Heard from our Rom Com finalist Paul A. Mendelsohn today that he has sold his finals placing project SEVILLE (based on his novel) to Avatar Entertainment, who acquired rights to the romantic comedy-meets-sci-fi book for a feature adaptation (which Paul has already written and is revising with them now!)

Avatar founder Larry Robinson is producing the film and UK-based director George Siougas is attached to direct. Siougas is known for his BAFTA- and Oscar-shortlisted film The One Note Man from 2024.

We're really excited for Paul and excited to see Seville come to life on the big screen! Since placing in the finals, Seville has been a heavily requested project via the Rom Com Lookbook and through OWAs.

SEVILLE follows middle-aged couple William and Luisa, who travel to the Spanish city of Seville in Spain during Semana Santa (Holy Week), where they honeymooned exactly 30 years prior, seeking to rejuvenate their lackluster marriage. Upon arrival, however, they begin to experience time-bending encounters with their younger selves, leading them to contend with the deep regrets and painful losses that led to the breakdown of their marriage.

Great job and congrats, Paul! Anything is possible people! Happy New Year!

Most rewrites fail because writers focus on:

- dialogue

- pacing

- structure

- character beats

- scene transitions

But those are downstream.

If the upstream spine is unclear, no amount of downstream rewriting will stabilize the script.

Here’s the upstream rewrite sequence:

1. Re‑state the spine in one clean sentence.

“This story is ultimately about ______.”

If this sentence is muddy, the rewrite will be muddy.

2. Re‑define the story’s function.

Ask:

- What is this story doing to the audience?

- What is it interrupting?

- What is it revealing?

- What is it challenging?

This is the story’s job.

3. Re‑sequence the engines.

Only after the spine and function are clean do you move to:

- structure

- scenes

- dialogue

- pacing

This is where most writers start — and why most rewrites collapse.

⭐ The Upstream Rewrite Principle

Fix the identity, and the story stabilizes.

Fix the scenes, and the story collapses again.

When you rewrite upstream, the downstream pages become inevitable instead of chaotic.

Most writers get stuck because they’re trying to run three different engines at the same time. When these engines collapse into one moment, the writer experiences:

- confusion

- false starts

- emotional fatigue

- endless rewriting

- “I don’t know what this story is anymore”

Here are the three engines:

Engine 1 — The Identity Engine (Upstream)

This answers:

“What is this story fundamentally about?”

Not thematically — structurally.

Examples:

- “A person who can’t let go.”

- “A world that punishes honesty.”

- “A family built on a lie.”

This is the spine.

If the spine is unclear, the script will drift.

Engine 2 — The Function Engine (Midstream)

This answers:

“What is this moment supposed to do to the audience?”

- destabilize

- reveal

- escalate

- interrupt

- reframe

This is the behavioral layer — the story’s job beat by beat.

Engine 3 — The Execution Engine (Downstream)

This answers:

“How do I express that on the page?”

- scene design

- dialogue

- pacing

- structure

- character choices

This is where the pages finally appear.

⭐ The Writer’s Structural Rule

You cannot run all three engines at once.

When you try, you freeze.

When you separate them, you move.

PART 1 — “Most Screenwriting Problems Aren’t Writing Problems.”

Most writers assume their struggles come from:

- structure

- dialogue

- pacing

- character arcs

- scene transitions

But those are downstream symptoms.

The real friction usually begins upstream, long before the first page is written.

Upstream clarity starts with one question:

“What is the story trying to stabilize?”

Not the plot.

Not the theme.

Not the logline.

Not the character arc.

Those are downstream.

Upstream is the identity layer — the part that defines the story’s purpose before anything is written.

When writers skip this layer, they end up:

- rewriting Act 1 endlessly

- building scenes that don’t belong

- chasing contradictory notes

- losing the spine of the story

- feeling like the script “isn’t working” without knowing why

Here’s the upstream truth:

A screenplay is a stabilizing device.

If you don’t know what it stabilizes, the pages collapse.

Hi Creators, please check out the screen plays for my projects Blood Line The Lost Kingdom of Papa New Guinea and Quantum Sailor based off books I have published. I am looking for feedback. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. --Thanks Darryl Mitchell